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He is an alcoholic and I told him that I can't be with him because it is making me unhealthy (verbal abuse) and pointless because I have only seen him 3 times the past month, now hes asking me to come around when he parents come to visit (they live 7 hrs away and have only been here twice out of two years) What should I tell him?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:32 PM on Sep. 15, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Run! Run away from him. If he gets professional help then give him another chance, if he WONT seek help dump him with the rest of the trash on the curb.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 10:39 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • sorry but I can't do it any more. Good by
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 10:43 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • This sounds a bit familiar to me....(life experience)...tell him NO. Sounds like he is using you to "save face" with his parents. Maybe his parents also know of his alcoholism and he is ashamed of it, but wants to reassure his parents that he has changed his ways and is able to get a great woman like you. You need to leave him. Be firm....he can't change for anyone but for himself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:46 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • He parents know about it but he doesnt know they know... I told them a couple months ago but I never told them how bad he treats me when he does drink.

    That makes a lot of sense... we have been on and off for two years but they probably think we are happily together or he thinks that because he has never told them the truth.

    I just got a find appropriate and mature way to say no because right now I would like to tell him that I will go but I am going to tell them everything or that I am not going to pretend like we are together when we're not.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • Tell him sorry that you are not is stepping stone and that he needs to grow up realize he has a problem and deal with it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • Listen to your head, not your heart. I can tell you already know the answer to this question. Do the RIGHT thing. Just like all the other boyfriends we all have had (and forgotten) - you'll lose interest in him over time, too.
    texassahm

    Answer by texassahm at 11:36 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • Sorry, forgot to answer the question - tell him "I am sorry if I misled you. I no longer wish to share my life with you."
    texassahm

    Answer by texassahm at 11:38 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • If it is hopeless then stop giving him hope. Tell him NO then quit talking to him. Better yet, stop talking to him at all. No contact. No emails. Delete his texts. Don't take his calls. Every time you talk to him you make him think you are reconsidering being with him. Only you can stop it and make him leave you alone. (been there, done that, was married to an alcoholic - they move on quickly if you stop talking to them)
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:43 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • I haven't responded or answered since sunday... so far, so good. I just dont know how to respond to the parent question. Guess no is good.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:48 PM on Sep. 15, 2009

  • Tell him no. Tell him that you understand that he wants to see his parents, but, as they're HIS parents, surely he can work out a time / place with them for him to see them without you having to be involved.

    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 5:19 AM on Sep. 16, 2009

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