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Tell me if im wrong for feeling this way.

I just had my 6th miscarriage and im very sad to say the least. SIL is furious that I did not persoanlly call her and tell her that the baby died (i was 11.5 weeks). Also, she had an abortion 11 years ago and says becasue she really didnt want an abortion she knows excatally how I feel. This is turning into a huge fued. Is she being insensetive to me or am i overreacting?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:39 PM on Jun. 23, 2008 in Pregnancy

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • The little nugget of truth is that she is sorry she didn't have the baby and of course you are sorry you lost your baby. It is not the same thing. She isn't understanding that so she probably thinks she is relating. Maybe it is that detail in her past that gives her the compulsion to be part of your pregnancy experiences. You don't owe her any information or explanation. I would keep the next pregnancy to myself at least past 12 weeks and even longer if I could. I would simply say you do not want to talk about your pregnancies anymore at all until and unless you are ready. Disregard how SHE feels and feel free to focus on what YOU feel. You are going through a sad experience now for the sixth time. Make yourself and healing your priorty.
    manna1qd

    Answer by manna1qd at 7:05 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • She's being insensitive. That fact that you didn't call her personally- well in reality it's none of her business and the fact that she CHOSE to kill her unborn baby and you didn't makes the experience completely different! Tell her to back off!
    love_my_boys

    Answer by love_my_boys at 6:43 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • Ide tell her an abortion she didnt want was NOTHING like a miscarriage. she still had to choose to kill her baby. No body asked you if you wanted a miscarriage did they? Ignore her insensitive ass! My sister keeps misscarrying and she never calls any of us to tell us....well not since the 5th one anyways. I dont blame her for not calling me though. I have 2 adult kids....and I did loose 2 that were still born. I KNOW how she feels but she dosnt want to talk so I dont push her to or resent her for not sharing.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 6:45 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • she sounds like a toxic person. I would stay away from her. Im prochoice however I think once someone has an abortion they have no right to try and make others feel sorry for them. I wish you could clarify why she even had it. I cant think of one single way someone could force someone unwilling to abort a baby. Im sorry you lost your baby it is totally different than an abortion. I think she just wants attention
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:51 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • I don't think you're overreacting and she sounds like a cold evil person to me. I'm so sorry for your loss. You stay away from her and surround yourself with people who can help you heal. You take care of yourself first.She has ALOT of nerve to compare your situation with hers. She CHOSE to murder her unborn child, you had no choice in the loss of your babies. People like that make me sick!!!
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 7:26 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • SHE IS BEING INSENSITIVE. SHE CHOSE TO GIVE UP HER CHILD AND THEN HAS THE NERVE TO BE UPSET WITH YOU FOR LOSING YOURS WHEN YOU DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE
    Chels_Rivera

    Answer by Chels_Rivera at 7:28 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

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