I am an adoptive parent. My daughters birth mother and I had an open adoption until the beginning of this year probably around Feb. We have always been able to talk and keep in touch, but not now. I thought we had a pretty good relationship. I have been trying to get ahold of her....phone, letters, etc. I keep sending my updates and pics, but a phone call would be nice too. I have the same number I always have and she has it. I have her number and when I call, I always leave a message. I'm sure she has alot going on, but what is my next step? I feel like she doesnt want me to call or write. I am going to keep doing it, but should I? Please no bashing...just want some insight.Answer Question
Asked by Anonymous at 5:49 PM on Sep. 16, 2009 in Adoption
Answer by Southernroots at 5:55 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
Answer by officerjoeys at 6:42 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 6:42 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
It may be a little like a birth mother after first meeting their child again. Many times there is hesitation then contact, hesitation then contact again and again from the the teen/adult child. The advice given that results mostly in an eventual relationship is keep up small bits of contact. Nothing dramatic or questioning why. You are already doing this well, keep at it ,have patience and when she is able to move past what is inhibiting her from enjoying your efforts she will probably be back. Both your child and her birth mother are lucky you are kind and diligent.. I am a birth mother that hasn't had reunion. I am envious, Good luck.
Answer by drfink at 6:51 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
Answer by PortAngeles1969 at 7:47 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
I would just keep saving all the things you have been collecting. She might re-connect at some point. Just continue being there for her.
Answer by Anonymous at 8:22 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 8:32 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
I think you just said it perfectly. "We are moving overseas. I want you to know that we will still remain in contact no matter where we are and I don't want you to ever doubt it." It's perfect. Also, I think it would be a really good idea to send your forwarding info to the adoption agency just in case you never hear from her again. That way when your daughter is an adult, if any of her extended birth family want to find her, the agancy can contact you.
Answer by onethentwins at 8:46 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
Answer by Dannee at 9:03 PM on Sep. 16, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Sep. 16, 2009