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My clingy 9 month old and my inlaws..

My baby is 9 months old and we're extremely close. She's also going thru separation anxiety and stranger anxiety, and the only person she wants when there are strangers is me. My in-laws and husband take this as I have spoiled her too much, they think I should just let her cry but she'll follow me around the room and sit at my feet and scream til I pick her up if there are "strangers" around. She suffered a brain injury at 4 months old so I just cannot let her cry especially when all she needs for comfort is me. I don't see why they can't just be thankful that she's a happy and healthy baby instead of trying to "break her" of her habit of constantly clinging to me. Am I being stubborn about this or are they right in your opinion?


Asked by Anonymous at 8:53 PM on Sep. 16, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • You're right, they're wrong. It's as simple as that.

    Answer by WindyTheWidow at 9:08 PM on Sep. 16, 2009

  • A baby can not be spoiled... They don't do those things because they are spoiled, they do things because it's a need!
    The way your daughter is acting right now is totally normal for her age, don't worry.

    Answer by crazypink at 8:56 PM on Sep. 16, 2009

  • You are totally right! First of all that behavior is just a stage and she WILL eventually grow out of it. I have two kids of my own and I know how you feel. My nephew was the worst with my sister but as he got older it got easier for him. You haven't done anything wrong.

    Answer by lathena at 8:58 PM on Sep. 16, 2009

  • Hold her all you want. They are so wrong. If you were talking about a 9 year old, it would be a different story, but this is a baby! Your LO is acting the way she is supposed to for her age. They probably feel bad because she won't ge to them. But your baby's feelings and needs come first! My DD would have anything to do with my FIL until a few weeks ago. Now at 21 months she will hug him and sit on his lap.

    Answer by Drewlove at 9:01 PM on Sep. 16, 2009

  • its just a phase i believe. my nephew was like that. he didnt want to be around anyone but my brother , was afriad to be away from him for a minute or he'd scream and cry until my bro would pick him up. my nephew was 9 months at the time my i add. he is now 18 months and loves everyone and everything and can really careless where his daddy is when hes around new people. and my bro never did anything. so it just depends on the child i guess whether they are willing to move forward or just be scared and clingy for the rest of their lives.

    Answer by Kayge at 9:04 PM on Sep. 16, 2009

  • Mother-in-laws can be a real pain. My m-i-l whined and cried, saying I didn't want her to hold my baby girl. We got into arguments and I was made to look like the bad guy. This was when my dtr. was too young to show a preference. But i had a preference - she was by first and only baby and I wanted to hold her myself. My m-i-l also nagged, telling me that she needed a t-shirt on under clothes. She was my baby and I knew how to dress her on my own. As the mother you are almost always right. Good luck getting your husband to support you though. Mine took sides with his other and we are still have issues now and my dtr. is 6.

    Answer by Lauriesmommy at 10:49 PM on Sep. 16, 2009

  • my dd was like that and she still is and she 5 she doesnt like strangers..she will sit on my lap and hold me intill she feel comfy and takeoff and she older it only last like 10 monutes but as a bay it was horriable i would let people hold her for a few minutes thinking she would get over it but she didnt and when she started crying i took her back imeditally and soothed dd didnt even want anything to do with her dad i was virtually a single partent

    Answer by rainmommy at 11:24 PM on Sep. 16, 2009