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How to tell him nicely?..

I have been with DH for 9 yrs. For the past 4 yrs he has been packing on the weight. We have always had great sex, but lately I really don't want to have sex with him anymore because he's really heavy. I love him to death, but I can't find a nice way to tell him that, that's the reason we can't do it. I have tried being on top,sideways,doggy..and during all those sessions he gets really tired...I have tried many nice ways to hint him that he needs to loose weight, but he won't..I'm also really concerned about his health...please help!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:33 AM on Sep. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • get his doctor involved. have him get a full physical, and go with him! its your business, after all...talk to the doctor together about concerns for his healthy weight, his heart, mentality...is he depressed? he might not realize he is, or might be afraid to admit it-you know how weak that makes men feel.
    if you need to, you should get a physical, as well. make it a couple-thing. there are always hidden-dangers to be aware of, even if you aren't overweight..cholesterol, for one.
    lead by example in your family diet and exercise. get him out of the house and go for walks..as a couple. join a gym..as a couple. consider your overall health to be a fun, romantic thing to do for each other. it will bring you closer..as it seems you are pulling away sexually, and that will only add to his 'problem'..again, you know how men are.
    thehairnazi

    Answer by thehairnazi at 3:10 AM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • If you all ready told him in a sweet way and that did not work. you might have to be blunt with him. sometime men only get it if you tell them how it is. I also agree with thehairnazi
    BOOGIETHEBOOG

    Answer by BOOGIETHEBOOG at 6:29 AM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • Tell him you are on a health kick and want to build up everyone's immune systems for the upcoming flu season.
    Stop buying junk foods and start preparing healthier meals. replace simple grains with whole grains; cut back on meat and dairy and add legumes; increase the amount of fruits and vegetables; don't buy beverages, just drink water.
    Start family walks after dinner.
    Contact me off list if you have any questions.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:33 AM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • I know how you feel. When I read your story I was thinking are you two living together?; because maybe you can try cooking healthy meals for him. Also buy more fruits, vegetables and lean meats. Popcorn is a light snack, and you can introduce or influence him to go on walks with you or joining a gym, also start off walking and work up to jogging. You are an intelligent woman and I know you can get him to give you what you need. If all this doesn't work than be honest and tell him the truth of how you really feel but be gentle. Good luck!
    witness833

    Answer by witness833 at 7:36 AM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • Honesty. Nothing better it. He can't run away from the truth. Try tp encourage him to go for a walk. Cook more with veggies. U can control what he eats and how much portion he gets. That is what I do with my husband. I make sure his meals are satisfying and enough to keep him filled for a while. But u have to tell him. When u love someone u care about them.
    BuzyMamma

    Answer by BuzyMamma at 10:17 AM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • We can't always be nice....just tell him Honey you have gained a lot of weight.....take out an old picture of him and say see how sexy and healthy you used to be.....if he gets mad....tell him you have been dropping subtle hints but that he has ignored them and its time for an intervention. Tell him how you want him to live a long and healthy life and that you feel he never has energy anymore...I wouldn't mention the bedroom though....i think thats too mean.. Good luck.....
    abbyg

    Answer by abbyg at 11:25 AM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • This one will work!!! Tell him for every 30 pounds he loses he will gain an inch of d*ck! It's actually true. Just think, that extra skin has to go some where, normally DOWN! I'm not saying that to just so you get what you want. My DH's doctor told him and he lost weight real fast! lmao
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:45 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • AP @ 7:45pm...that's too funny lmao!!!..thanks!! I will inform him lol!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:51 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

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