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not wanting husband to have more time w/child

My DH has a child who has been misbehaving in his after school program. My Dh has asked the childs mom if they could do one week off one week on rotation during the school year too and not just summer. He wants to see his kid more plus he thinks he can help better by seeing him more instead of every other weekend. My neighbors do this and it seems to work fine. The mom does not want to have any part of this. She won't expalin herself. My DH just thinks she doesnt want to give in. I think she is afraid he may want to end up being with us and she wont get her money for half custody. I think it is crazy she likes to try and control the situation. I told my DH to just be patience and maybe next year we could try again. We make sure he does his home work. We make sure he eats homecooked meals. He goes to bed ealry & we spend quality time.What would be her reason to not let him split the weeks to help him and be with him more?

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Asked by Anonymous at 1:35 PM on Sep. 17, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (6)
  • She's probably afraid she'll lose her child support since he'll be spening equal time with both parents.

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 1:39 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • get a lawyer and start trying to modify the custody/visitation agrrangment. She might be jealous, she might have something going on she doesn't want to tell you guys about. I share this with my ex. Or that's what we are supposed to do. We don't do child support because what's the point when the kids spend equal time with the parents? Our arrangment also says that we should only use the week to week and what ever other visitation in the papers as a fall back when we can't agree. Right now he's very busy so we've agreed that when he has a couple of days off, I let him take the kids and I keep them the rest of the time. He's welcome to come over, but instead of having to find a babysitter, he just leaves them with me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:39 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • she will lose her child support. there is not questioning that one. she wants the money.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:41 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • Why do people think its about the money. Personally, i couldn't imagine spending a week without my boys. And honestly, i think parents should think about that before they break up JMO.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:45 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • My stepdaughter spends the first half of the week with mom and the second half of the week at our house. She is close to both her mom and our family, and it's the best of both worlds for her to have equal time with both parents.

    If you have good reasons why your stepson would be better off with a 50-50 split, then you can take it to court and petition them to make the change. But personally I would rather try addressing it with the mom again rather than dragging her to court. That would be a last resort for me, but JMO.

    I don't think any of us can tell you why she doesn't want to do it or what her reasons are. It could be a lot of things.

    Answer by riotgrrl at 2:10 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • i currently deal with the same situation and its rreally hard because the other mother wants to have full contral what it is and have it her way but lucky for cuz its a court order stating she must let him see his child and she has not been agreeing to the court papers so cuz of that she got in trouble for not complying with court orders ......SOME PEOPLE JUST LIKE TO THINK THERE STILL IN CONTRAL...

    Answer by LILMAMA102206 at 6:54 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

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