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REALLY, REALLY THIS IS ALSO MY JOB LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE???

MY EX FAMILY IS ALWAYS COMPLAINING THAT THEY NEVER SEE THE KIDS---THEY TELL ANYONE WHO WILL LISTEN AND WHEN OTHER PEOPLE APPROACH ME AND SAY "OH I SAW SO AND SO AND SHE SAID SHE HASN'T SEEN THE KIDS IN SOOOOO LONG" IT PISSES ME OFF TO THE MAX!!! THEY DO NOT CALL, WRITE, EMAIL, COME OVER OR ANYTHING!! IS IT REALLY MY RESPONSIBILTY TO CALL THEM AND MAKE ARRANGEMENTS TO SO THEY CAN SEE THE KIDS, REALLY IS IT, THEY ARE THE ONES TO LAZY TO PICK UP A PHONE, REALLY???? REALLY???

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:43 PM on Sep. 17, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (9)
  • lol they are probably complaining just to complain, some people are like that
    pookipoo

    Answer by pookipoo at 10:44 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • i'd probably make an effort personally, but more for my kids sake than theirs. my kids adore their grandparents and if something were to happen to dh and i. i'd want them to still be able to see them. but it wouldn't be a regular i'll call them every week thing, i'd call maybe once a year for bday or something and say hey the kids want to see you. if they don't come at least i know i'm not the one preventing it.
    but no its not your responsibility if anyones it's their fathers since its his family
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 10:45 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • As I say the road travels 2 ways. Maybe you should take the high road though and call them and set up a time, this may open the line for communication. Tell them that you dont appreciate them talking to other people about it and if they want to see the kids they need to contact you.
    ashleyuc07

    Answer by ashleyuc07 at 10:46 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • Nope. If they wanna see them, then they need to make an effort. I would just tell those people. "OH... Well, I didn't think they wanted to, seeing as they never call/write/email" ETC...
    SAMNMAYASMOM

    Answer by SAMNMAYASMOM at 11:24 PM on Sep. 17, 2009

  • my advice is be the bigger person give them a call have polite small talk and give them the oppurtuntuies to visit. then its up to them if they take the chance. i too understand i deal with it with my mother but i can say the boys do talk to her on the phone once an awhile.
    cat260

    Answer by cat260 at 12:00 AM on Sep. 18, 2009

  • If you make the effort they have no room to complain, that's how I feel. My almost ex MIL knows she can see my daughter anytime. All she has to do is call and we're over there. Since my ex lives in a different state and family means a LOT to me I try to make the effort...at Christmas time, Grandparents' Day, and grandma's birthday we're over there. I also let my stbx MIL know if we're having any parties for my daughter or if there are special things going on (i.e. when my daughter was dedicated at church, my stbx MIL was there-my stbx was NOT). So yeah, to answer your question, it is up to you a little bit....throw a bone to them and see how they respond; they may just be worried about contacting you first.
    nikspineapple

    Answer by nikspineapple at 7:40 AM on Sep. 18, 2009

  • You know, it's a mutual issues. It's just as easy for you to pick up the phone too. Sometimes I ask for a baby sitter or a visit, and sometimes my parents do. It takes work to keep a family together so if you put in a little, they will too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:50 AM on Sep. 18, 2009

  • I am sorry if I make anyone mad but I deal with a simular issue with my ex & his mom & dad!!! He never calls and when he does its to argue and cuse and I'm not dealing with him but his parents I have told to call anytime they want to but for some reason they don't!!! They live 3 staes away and I am a single mother and I can't afford to pack up me & 4 kids and go see them....their son is a DB and doesn't help any so I am not going out of my way to make ppl be a part of my kids life now or ever!!! They got mommy and thats what matters!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:05 AM on Sep. 18, 2009

  • We always say the phone works both ways. How are we supposed to know when a good time to visit is? They should call and invite.
    Pnukey

    Answer by Pnukey at 1:25 PM on Sep. 18, 2009

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