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Girl vs Boy trouble

Okay I need help ladies,apparently my daughter threw a plastic soda bottle at a boy who's in the 6th grade and this kid is in the same class as her.Both her friends and her claim this boy follows them around and has touched them on their chest and the girls have tried to tell the principle and other people at school but nothing happens no talks nothing.I know the child in my neighborhood and he tends to stair at people,he's one of the boys that gets teased and girls dont like. The mom called the police,something I didnt know about until I got called later on at work. I've given my daughter lectures about how we need to behave and what happens when we hurt people and told her about jail. She understand this,and says she is tired of him staring at her chest. I also found out that this boys dad has been in jail for rape in the past. I worry about this boy and the way he hangs around the girls.I need suggestions no bashing please

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:04 AM on Sep. 19, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (7)
  • Have your daughter start telling for EVERY time he acts inapropriately. Every time he gets handsy, every time he stares at her chest, every time he says something inappropriate. And her friends should do the same. Teach her how to defend herself if he should ever try anything with her. Tell her how to be safe and avoid him. These types of people pick girls who are victims... who won't stand up for themselves, who don't want to tell anyone, and they single them out and victimize them by continuing to sexually harrass them. Tell her that boys like this are dangerous.

    I have never had to deal with this problem at this age, but my teenage sister lets guys do this to her, and then they end up following her home or cornering her when she's alone and harrassing her. Teach your daughter not to be a victim and the advances will stop.
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 12:11 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • This would have me concerned to the highest level. While teaching your daughter not to be a victim is something I am sure you've done.. This does not work for every case as everyone is different. If this is happening at school I would park my butt down at the Principal's office and demand action. If none is taken, go higher! A child should feel safe going to school, and yours obviously does not feel safe- I.E. she through the bottle at him. look up numbers for the superintendent, district people, anyone that will listen. Your local Children Protection Services office would have that information, I would think. Good luck!

    jessicacoda

    Answer by jessicacoda at 3:21 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • Your daughter and her friends are in danger! Do not mess with the school get the police involved. This is sexual harassment and can escalate into more. The boy needs help also and the school is not doing anything. Do not get onto your daughter for protecting herself she did what she should and should be praised, make sure the girls hang out in at least a group of 3

    higherboundmom

    Answer by higherboundmom at 11:05 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • The mother of the boy called the police the school principal called me to inform me of what happened,my daughter told the cop that he follows her and her friends around and wont leave her alone,when the kids touched her just above her breast she told the cop this and the cop said "thats not sexual harrasment" as my daughter put it and he also said that the kid isnt stalking her. I dont know what to do she is in my neighborhood and doesnt think her child is doing anything to annoy anyone. She also thinks that her son doesnt tease. I go to the same ward as her and am scared to go anywhere around this woman and her husband because they wont listen. I wish my daughter hadnt thrown the anything at this kid,I've told her she needs to let him fade into the background. Noone at school will do anything because the kid IS only following her around.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:00 PM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • move your daughter to a different school, and have her friends moms do the same thing! unwanted touching ANYWHERE on the body is sexual harassment!!! even something as ambiguious as a shoulder or her hair!

    threaten to sue the school, the principal, the officers involved and anyone else who has heard of this boys actions and done nothing! you'll start getting results when a lawyer starts talking to them about this situation
    bi-polarmommy

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 3:24 PM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • I had to read you post a couple of times to understand the situation. I think this is a situation where you have a boy who is constantly teased or a target of all the kids in school. He probably does stare and acts inappropriately. But I think you should be questioning your DD's behavior too. Just b/c she said she is tired of him staring. Do you think that maybe your DD and her friends retaliated? I mean why would the boy's mother call the police? That doesn't seem rational unless this kid is a target b/c of the father's past. Which I think has no bearing on the situation. And plus don't you think it is weird that your DD told the cops that he touched her ABOVE the breast? Why wouldn't the principle do anything? Did you go talk to the principle? If someone called the police on my child, I damn sure would be getting to the bottom of the situation. I sure wouldn't be scared either. There are too many questions.
    Doodlesrevenge

    Answer by Doodlesrevenge at 9:19 AM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • Oh I've questioned my daughter and her friends about this boy and they all said that he follows them around and torments them on the playground,he stops when an adult aproaches. I was sitting in church one day with my kids and the same boy that teases my kids also was staring for an hour,um yea I timed it,but was staring at my son! It was really weird. I have had the talk with my daughter about this kid if he keeps following her around she needs to report it and also her friends and even if he teases them. I told her to scream as loud as she can to him,to STOP FOLLOWING ME. So will see what happens hopefully this will go away
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:26 AM on Sep. 21, 2009

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