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Did your sex life change drastically after you had a baby?

My bf and I hardly every have sex anymore. Dd is almost 10 months...I really thought my sex drive would come alive again by now but it just hasn't. I'm totally in love with this man I'm just never in the mood. Anyone else going through this?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:22 AM on Sep. 19, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • My advice is make it an effort to fantasize about your man. Fantasize about the type of sex you would like to have, really think about it even if it's something you think he would never do. Then tell him about it and he may just surprise you. Either way it may really get you hot for him. It works for me.

    Answer by Tickledtrauma at 3:48 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • no you have to force it or make it kinky but yes ut definetly dies but flutters back every so often

    Answer by mirit.rose at 1:24 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • For a while it did. I still had a higher sex drive like I did before baby, but DH's decreased.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:24 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • It does take a little more effort. Before you have all this time to be together & now you don't. Whenever I'm in the mood, my son is either still up or it's become too late in the evening. It doesn't really help that i'm more of a morning person & my husband is more of a evening person. You just have to find ways to make it happen & then when you do, your wondering...Wow! why don't we do this more often. Good luck with your struggles...We all have been in that same situation a time or two.

    Answer by onespecialmom at 1:28 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • going through the same thing im just so tired by the time baby is in bed and then of course my husband works so so early thats he already asleep by the time im ready for bed. You have to force it and try to find time for each other and find things that help get you in the mood, a nice massage or something.

    Answer by RykersMom04 at 1:37 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • Complete opposite happened. We realized how much we weren't having sex, and now we have more sex than we did in the past and we have only been together for two years. Then again a lot of this came on because we totally reformed our way of thinking. We decided to put all our sexual energies in each other. No its not easy to not fantasize about another person, and of course no porn, but it has made a major improvement. Right now I can only see him on the weekends and we have more sex than we did before this situation. And we make it an effort to have phone sex during the weekdays. Which is actually a lot of fun i never knew before. I'm sure a lot of this had to do with this big change but my pregnancy sucked and helped us to open our eyes. We had sex about 7 times during my whole pregnancy so something had to be fixed.

    Answer by Tickledtrauma at 3:45 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • Yes it did. It is a nightmare. I went from being the super sex wanting girl to "I can do without" . It sucks. It is work for sure but it will never be the same

    Answer by Lauren24 at 3:59 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • yep same age and now i understand how people can be nuns.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:09 AM on Sep. 19, 2009

  • same way here,my lil one is 15months now and we have had sex mabe 15 - 20 times since she was born.we go a month without it at never in the mood either

    Answer by angelairelan at 9:36 AM on Sep. 19, 2009