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what should i do? please i need advice

Hi Cafe Mom! Me and my boyfriend has been together for 3 years. I must say it was a rockey 3 years but were still together. Any way My boyfriend is in the military and he is staioned in Connecticut and its like a three hour ride from NewYork. His mom is friends with a 27 year old female who has two kids and she at their house every single DAY! I know this because when i call to see how shes doing This woman picks up. My boyfriend has a history of cheating on me and now i have this feeling that they are messing around. As i type she is in the car with them heading off to Connecticut. When i call him and shes around he gets an attitude with me for no reason so it has me thinking... i don't want to ask because all he will say is "you're crazy" or "why are you acting jealous that shes my friend"

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:37 PM on Sep. 20, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • I would not accuse but I certainly would ask "Is this friendship with her something I need to be concerned with?"
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:39 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • If he has a "history of cheating" on you then why are you even with him?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:44 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • Cheaters cheat. If he has done it more than once in your relationship, he is doing it zgain. I admit sometimes, if your SO cheats once and can't live with himself and is completely sorry and what not, they may have learned from their mistake. But if he has done it more than once, he doesn't have that sence the it was wrong. You should just ask the girl. She would tell you before he would...
    Jace1028

    Answer by Jace1028 at 2:48 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • If he cheated already and has a history of it, why do you want to add more to the history? I would be very suspicious if I were you. He has proven that he can't be trusted.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:52 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • How is your boyfriend to you when all 3 of you are together? Is he still your boyfriend or just a friend? I think you already know he is cheating with her and you know what to do.
    treynlisa

    Answer by treynlisa at 2:53 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • There can be signs of messing up here. The fact that she's there everyday at his moms house. Why? Why does need to be there everyday. Observe and look at the whole situation. Put a hidden camera somewhere where he n she hangs out the most. Ask her maybe she'll tellu. But u need to ask him.
    BuzyMamma

    Answer by BuzyMamma at 2:54 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • i'd ask all of them, him, her and his mom. even if they all tell you no, you should be able to tell by now when he's lying and will possibly be able to tell if she and his mom are lying to you. does she avoid you when you are around, or is overly nice? (could be a sign of a guilty conscience) but you need to ask and if you get an answer that you don't believe or trust go from there. really though, it doesn't sound like the relationship is working out, based on your gut instinct, and i have to ask, why is she and his mom going and you weren't asked to go along as well? if you live in the same area, and you've been w/him for 3 yrs, to me it'd make sense for the girl or his mom to ask if you want to ride w/them to see him, since they didn't ask i'd have to question why they didn't want you around..
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 3:09 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • I go to school (college) full time and i work on fridays and saturdays. So when i get the chance to see him it be around 9 or ten at night and me and his mom don't really talk as much as we use to because now she has this woman to cry to all the time.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:32 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • There's no reason for him to have female "friends" that are not your friends. If it negatively effects your relationship in anyway he should sever ties with her. Think long and hard before you continue your relationship with some that doesn't take your feelings into consideration.
    mrsjonzy

    Answer by mrsjonzy at 10:44 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

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