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Moms say its the bond between mother and child.

I didn't breastfeed and didn't really have the option to at the time. While I was pregnant I decided I wasn't comfortable with it. Then when my DS was born I wasn't given the option. He was in the Nicu over a week and no one bother to even ask. I do regret not even being able to try. I know I should of said something.

I still have a great bond with DS even with not breastfeeding... I don't get it.. What is with the bonding and breastfeeding thing?


Asked by Anonymous at 6:19 PM on Sep. 20, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • When you breastfeed there are hormones involved. These hormones enhance the mother child relationship. It's actually called attachment formation. When the baby suckles at the breast a pleasure signal is sent to the mother's brain. Hormones are released that are relaxing and pleasant form the mother and pass to the baby.

    The baby actually gets the hormomes through the breastmilk. Those hormones are pleasant for the baby, make the baby relax, and help the baby attach to it's mother. A breastfed baby can recognize it's mother's breastmilk smell and sweat smell when it's days old.

    The one hormone is oxytocin, the hormone of love. It is also the hormone that causes orgasm and the contractions of labor. There are endorphins, a powerful natural drug. Prolactin is another hormone called the mothering hormone.

    I'm sorry you missed it.


    Answer by Anonymous at 6:34 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • it IS a very bonding thing! i know that when i breastfed my daughter i felt so close to her,.and noone else could giveher the comfort i could. noone else could give her what i could. when bottle feeding the baby finds comfort in the bottle correct? well anyone can give a bottle..but not everyone can give the breast:) (as in not anyone that watches her can give her the comfort like mommy can) i guess thats why *i* felt it was such a bonding expirience.

    Answer by naturepeace at 6:36 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • Op here- Thanks for explaining

    My son is a mama's boy so I really don't feel like I'm missed out. IMO kwim

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:41 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • That is very sad. You'll never really understand. I'm sorry you missed out on such an important role as a mother.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:53 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • As a breastfeeding mother I don't get it either. If I hadn't been able to breastfeed it wouldn't have made me feel any less for my child and him for me. No one thing could possibly interfere with the bond we have. Breastfeeding is one of 100 things that bonded us. I feel sad for moms who couldn't breastfeed because of all the money they had to spend on formula. But I don't think I'm more bonded with my child than all the moms I know who bottle fed.


    Answer by MAUREEN55 at 7:48 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • Breast feeding is a great way to bond with your baby, but it's not the ONLY way to bond. You will always be bonded to your children and it doesn't make you less of a mom or less close to your children! Who ever is trying to make you feel bad about it should be ignored.

    I breast fed and I am glad I had the experience but I know it's not the only way! I was not breast fed as a baby and I have always been very close and very well bonded to my mother.

    Don't you ever let anyone make you feel like your less of a mother for this. It's nonsense.

    Answer by beckcorc at 7:48 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • Why are all the women that are making different choices for their bodies and their babies insulting each other?! Why don't women support each other and back each other up? If we don't start doing that, then its saying its okay to be insulted! I did not breastfeed. I could not produce milk even with medicine to try and stimulate it. I ADOPTED MY BABIES. So, though I tried I couldn't and I'm VERY bonded with them. So for the women insulting those who didn't breastfeed, do you have insults for me? I just don't get it...women should not be so disrespectful to each other. We are all mothers.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:52 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • Well I just wanted to throw ir in there, that I was breastfed, and I am not close to my mom at all...... And never have been.... So I don't see what the fuss is... The child will grow up to be who he/she wants to be, and thats it! And depending on the vibes you give your child, he may or may not be close to you. Breastfeeding does not make anyone any better of a mother! If it wasn't for formula, my baby would have had to drink cow milk, because I couldnt produce milk, but I am very close to my son, I mean they spend 9 months growing in your belly, you will be close when they are babies and young children no matter what!! Wow

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:02 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • I never bonded with my son when I breast fed. There was NO pleasure in it, only severe and extreme pain. I bawled with each feeding for two weeks until I switched to formula and THEN we finally bonded.

    He stopped crying all the time, I stopped being in such severe pain with each suck he made. And before you all jump on me, it wasn't nipple pain. It was stabbing, pulling pain through my entire breast. (both of them)

    There was no bonding. There was no pleasure signal, only pure hatred.

    I went right to formula with subsequent babies. I didn't miss a damn thing. I love them, they love me and we are bonded VERY well.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:27 PM on Sep. 20, 2009

  • I have nothing against breastfeeding it just wasn't what I choose to do and I bonded just fine with my children when they were babies and we are all really close now that they are growing up.I think what makes u bond is being a wonderful mother with unconditional love in every aspect of your childs life.

    Answer by mom2fivekids579 at 8:35 PM on Sep. 20, 2009