Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

No sex drive and hubby looking at porn??? :-(

I'm 13 weeks pregnant and have not had much of a sex drive since I got pregnant. We went from having sex everyday to once a week. This is my 2nd pregnancy and with my 1st I had an amazing sex drive, our sex life didn't change at all. Now that I'm pregnant with #2 and have a 2 1/2 yo, I'm pooped by time I get in bed. I won't deny him sex, but I'm not going to jump on top of him and initiate. If he doesn't initiate sex before I go to sleep, then I don't think he wants any. I've told him I have no sex drive, but I'm not going to deny him any, he just needs to start it. I got on our computer over the weekend to find a virus, I searched the history and he's been looking at some free porn sites. I am very upset that he needs to look at that and more so that now we have a damn virus on it.

Any advice ladies? Did you go through this? How did you deal with your hubby/ SO?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:38 AM on Sep. 21, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (4)
  • there men they going to look at it.. maybe u can watch it with him

    Answer by ashley_nick30 at 11:41 AM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • We still have a very active sex life- at least 5 times a week- and my hunny looks at porn and masturbates just about every day, even the days we have sex. Even the days we have sex twice! It doesn't bother me. It's normal.

    You smell all hormone-sexy and pregnancy can be a super pheromone turn on for guys. My sex drive is ZERO and I told him "You're going to have to start it. It's the furthest thing from my mind. I'm picking out baby furniture and a midwife." So he starts it.

    Be extremely clear. If the porn bothers you, tell him. It might help to write it out. I'm all about the crying while pregnant. Guys don't retain stuff when we cry. In writing is clear. Something like, "Porn makes me feel unattractive bc I've got a baby bump and those girls are all cocaine skinny. I'd prefer if you'd come ravish me like in the olden-times so I can feel sexy and important to you."

    I would totally knock his noggin re: computer virus

    Answer by ecodani at 11:45 AM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • I faked it pretty much my whole second pregnancy. Now there were days when I wanted some and would initiate it as soon as he got home. But overall, like you said, you're so tired all you think about is sleep. My DH understood and he has videos. I don't mind so much. I would prefer the videos over the computer and strip clubs any time. Hang in there, your mood may change.

    Oh, we have Avast antivirus and it's free.


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:47 AM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • huh... well i dunno the only advice i can give is watch it with im lol it might put you more in the mood.. i dunno my hubby couldnt get me away from him the frist and second trimester.. lol ( he got pretty tired of it actually) then my third trimester i got to tired to do anything and i walked in on him watching porn in the living room one night and watched it with him and that was probably the best sex we had in god knows how long lol... tell him instead of downloading viruses to go get a dang movie and you guys will make a night out of it! one of those days when your not to tired anyhow lol

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:46 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Pregnancy
pregnancy test?

Next question overall (Relationships)
need some of my friends back...