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Is it realistic to try to time a pregnancy?

I went off the pill at the end of June and we have been ttc since then. Just the other day, my husband let me know that we have a couple of weddings to go to next year and he wants to try to time it so that I am either less than 7 months pregnant at the weddings or I have already had the baby. The reason is that the weddings are for his brother (in June) and his sister (in July). He wants to ensure he can be at their weddings.

My question is: Is it realistic to try to time it like this? Or should we hold off? Or should we just go ahead and keep trying? This is our first and I really don't know how to proceed here.

Thank you in advance for your help and advice.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:07 PM on Sep. 21, 2009 in Trying to Conceive

Answers (10)
  • Just tell him "I really do not need to go to the weddings, if you are going to be like that about me being pregnant. I will just stay at home."
    You can try to time it. But it might not work.

    Answer by louise2 at 2:12 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • What methods are you using to ttc now? are you charting or just having sex and hoping?

    If you are trying to time it for these events what will happen after you have a baby? Babies don't work that way.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 2:16 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • I would hold off. It will be less stressful.

    Answer by gammie at 2:16 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • I just started charting last cycle.

    I think his concern is that I will be in labor during the wedding. It isn't the inconvenience, he just doesn't want to miss a big event like that. He doesn't want me to have to miss it either. We will have to travel by plane for both weddings, so being really pregnant will make it hard or impossible for me to be there if I am 8 or 9 months pregnant.

    I would rather not miss the weddings either, but I want a baby too. It is a weird situation. We just started trying, and it is hard to have to stop for a couple months. I don't know that I want to stop. If it happens, it happens.

    I understand his intentions, but I don't know that I agree.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:22 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • just start trying for a baby. educate yourself on pregnancy, because flying really won't be a problem.

    Answer by charisma10 at 2:55 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • well at this point i wpuld just wait a few months to ttc. bc if you got pregnant right now, your due date would be somwhere in july i think, so if he really want to paln it i would just wait.

    Answer by erika_wright at 3:12 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • If you were to get pregnant any time in the next month or two, you could be having the baby during a wedding. Since it's obviously important to him, I would hold off trying until December or January. You can use the extra time to keep charting and really get to know your cycle, that will make it that much less frustrating when you're trying to make use of the information you're getting and you won't have to guess as much. :)

    Answer by DragonRiderMD at 3:42 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • You can't hold off living your life so that you can support others as they live theirs. That said, it may be less stressful to wait a few months, and ultimately you have to make the choice. Make sure you are using the time to take a prenatal vitamin with a nice amount of folic acid and exercise regularly... both will be good for you when you are finally expecting.

    Answer by tyheamma at 4:32 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • Yes and no. It is realistic to plan when you don't want to be pregnant, but planning exactly when you want to have your baby isn't very realistic. If there are a few months when it would not be convenient to have the baby, then take precautions during the time you could conceive a baby due in that time period. It might be hard on your husband and other members of his family if you gave birth during one of his sibblings weddings since he will want to be at the birth and the wedding. This does make sense. It also might be hard on his parents who would want to support their child who is getting married as well as the one who is having a baby.

    i planned mine not to interfere with my bussiest time at work, and I'm really glad I did it that way.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:29 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

  • A lot of my friends are school teachers and planned their pregnancies around the school year schedule. Sometimes they come early and change your plans! Good luck with your planning and I send you praise for your organization. You will make the right choice for your whole family.

    Answer by ecodani at 9:57 PM on Sep. 21, 2009

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