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dh dosent understand my point of veiw..but refuses to talk about it..

our home was tested positive for lead, the state came in inspected and told landlord this is what needs to be done and they even gave him a grant to fund it. the state and landlord decided to do vacant apt first ( its a duplex) then when its time for our side landlord said we could move nextdoor temporarily so work can be done to mine heres the would be a pain to move somethings nextdoor like pots and pans, food,microwave, beds,couch, tv,comp, and have bills shut off and turned on over there for say 3 weeks or more. just to end up haveing 2 elecrtic bills, heat bills, cable. so i asked my mom if we could stay with her till work was done..thats fine. dh dosent want to go he would rather deal with the moving also if we stay somewere else we dont have to pay rent we if we move next door we do. dh and me both are tired of landlord and his non intrest in this place. but cant move till we have money to do it.

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:02 AM on Sep. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • cont..and that wont be till jan or feb. he thinks its ok to stay and just deal with it but i say its more of a pain were at my moms theres pots and pans. toys, beds, he loves my mom but would rather just deal with the mess then the convenence.. im the one home with kids not him. im the one that deals with it all. and landlord wont put bills in his name. or pay the bills for the 3 weeks or will be up to us. and he cant rent places out till lead is gone. so if we do move before work is done landlord is with out tenents or rent. but dh dosent want to talk about it says it just ticks him off were i would like to know whats going on before things happen..what do i say to him?

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:08 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Do you have to move out while the work is done? If not, then how about you and the kids go stay with your mom and your dh stays with the house - that way, he doesn't have to stay with your mom and you don't have to pack everything and move, have 2 sets of bills, etc.

    Or, just move out completely into the other unit, and don't move back into the one you're in now. That way, you can stay in the new one, only pay rent for that one that you're in, and then the land lord can fix up the unit you're in now and rent it to someone else (either way, he has someone in one unit and one waiting to be rented). Then, you could either stay there or you could move in Jan or so like you planned.


    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 8:29 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • It honestly doesn't sound like you are willing to compromise, either of you. You want to move to your moms but won't take the time to ask him why he doesn't want to. He wants to move to the other place but doesn't ask you why have a communication problem.
    The problem is that you asked your mom before you talked to your husband is what I am getting from this...and that upset him that you didn't discuss it first. Now he is being stubborn and would rather not move.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 8:50 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • There is going to be lead dust all over your belongings if you leave them in the apt. I wouldn't stay in the next apt for the same reason. As a matter of fact I'd put my stuff in storage & stay with mom until I could find a safe place to move bc the lead dust can cause brain damage and more for your children.

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:40 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

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