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Is my fiance having an affair with his ex?

I have been with my fiance 8 years we have 2 children together and recently i have found his phone bill and he has been texting his ex 377 text messages and 70 phones calls. He said there is nothing in it and she wanted to say sorry for how she treated him and to say she had a miscarriage with his baby 12 years ago. He said he doesent love her or want to get back with her but that he loves me but i dont believe him and i dont know what to do please help.

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:37 AM on Sep. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Well you have a decision to make. Leave him or stay with him. It is easy to leave a man you are not married to. Cutting the ties is a lot easier


    Answer by louise2 at 8:41 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • I am sorry you are dealing with this. If you HAVE to ask...yo already KNOW the answer. This is wrong on so many levels, and your heart is ignoring your brain(so to speak). Ask, S.O., to pu himself in your shoes, how would he feel? 70 phone calls & 377 text is more than " I am sorry'. You now have a more serious question to ask...what are you going to do about it! Blessings, C.J.

    Answer by ceejay1 at 8:42 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Um, if a man is texting/talking more with another woman than his SO, then there is something going on.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 8:48 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • I would tell him he has a decision to make--either he chooses you or he chooses her. A woman should not have to be constantly worrying about whether or not her husband is 100% devoted to her and whether or not he is 100% trustworthy. If you have doubts, you will be living in constant turmoil. It's time he made a decision.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:59 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Hmmm I don't see how it would take 70 phone calls and 377 texts for either of them to say "I'm sorry for how things worked out" and if she had a miscarriage 12 yr ago- WHY is she telling him or talking to him about it now? It is over and done with- he has obviously moved on with his life and has a new family. I think you have a right to be concerned. I would definately sit him down and say "what the hell is going on? Why after 8 years are you texting and calling her- that many times?" I would let him know it is hurtful to you, and he has a choice--- he can cut ALL contact and block her and be with you, or you can kick his sorry ass to the curb. How would HE like it if you were suddenly calling and texting an ex? Bet it would not sit too well with him.
    I hope everything works out- good luck

    Answer by MizLee at 9:09 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Girl you know his up to no good and he knows your going to along with it. If all you gonna do is complaint, cry and stay, then stay off his phone.

    Its amazes me what we as women will put up with. If are girlfriend or sister was calling and texting are man, we will put her in her place that moment, no if ands or buts about it but are man we play dumb and ask stupid questions that we know we know he answer too. If you gonna stay demand respect, if you gonna leave get your plan in place and leave.

    Answer by Ministerswife at 9:15 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Sounds like a yes, you just don't know the details, and you guys have a family have been together for 8 years and he still hasn't married you!?!?!?!?!? I'd move on, there is better out there and you and the kids can have a way better life without all the infidelity. I'd do some detective work myself, not to be a stalker but just to learn the truth. Good Luck

    Answer by MommaRox4683 at 9:21 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • well if he dont care about her why is talking to her ?? and so much? ask him why he is talking to her then. there is a thing u can put in ur husbands phone where u can read his text messages and see who calls him or who he calls i dont know what its called tho sorry :/

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:29 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • I text a lot, & event the person i text the most could not add up to 377 text's. AND 70 phone calls? That's A LOT of phone calls. You need to do some serious investigating.

    377 texts, is WAYYY more than what is needed to say "i had a miscarriage 12 years ago" & "i'm sorry" You need to play private investigator, i know it sounds snoopy, but sometimes that is the only way to really get the truth. He will lie no matter what. He will never admit that he is cheating. So, you're going to have to find out for yourself. Pretend like you believe him, then do your investigatng when he is not looking.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:48 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • wow that's a lot of messages just to say she had a miscarriage 12 yrs ago. She must have said it one word in each phone call or msg.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Sep. 22, 2009

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