Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Should I quit my Job because of my kids?

To make a long story short. I have been battling with my 2 boys 13 and 12 about what they call "freedom" Privacy" and " trust". I changed their school because the kids in the school started to have a negative influence on mine. Thru out the summer i kept them busy with no time to think about those kids. Now that school started and I'm working they talk thru AIM and those kids are always asking for my kids to go and visit them outside the old school. I don't want them to go because I know there are always fights and the most of the girls love to throw themselves to my son ( he's tall and looks a little oldr) The teacher always warned me about this inappropriate behavior with the girls and I'm afraid if he goes something can happen and get in worse touble bcuz he's not from that school anymore. Today he asked for permission i said no. He challenged me back and said "Im going anyway, now I'm at work worried!!!

Answer Question

Asked by maxmom28 at 3:33 PM on Sep. 22, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I wouldn't quit my job. Sounds to me like you need to lay down the law. If he disobeys and goes anyways take away all things he does not need, ipod, cell phone, tv, whatever he likes the most. Then if u cannot get him to obey the rules treat him like a toddler and get him a babysitter when you aren't there if you quit your job you are showing him that he is in control and that is not what you want a teenage child to think GL I hope you can get him to listen

    Answer by mommymandaleigh at 3:49 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • I worked my entire life until recently when I decided to homeschool my preteen. I am willing to make sacrifices instead of constantly stressing out about all the problems with public school. I am fortunate because my dh has a decent job but I still have to cut back. So far, it has been one of the best decisions our family has made.

    Answer by writeon at 8:21 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • if you can afford it, then yes do yourself the headaches

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:30 AM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • I wanted to go back to work sooo bad but my kids 5 and 9 are trouble aside from ADHD we have behavioral problems. I have them in a private school and somehow especially my 9 yr old still can manage to cause me grief. We have three neighbors and live rural,we have already had problems w/neighbors! I don't expect things to magicly change either. I guess I am here for the long haul. Sometimes I think we just have to sacrifice to get them graduated from high school and grown.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:55 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • In my opinion it is more important for a parent to be home during the tween and teen years than preschool and elementary ages. A competent childcare can keep younger children safe and happy and alert you to potential problems. Once a child gets past childcare age is when the real dangers start! If you are at work your child has freedoms he is not ready for and you can only worry not offering the guidance they need. If possible I would try to work when they are in school or a shift where you or Dad are home when the kids are home. As for freedom, trust and privacy they are earned privileges not rights and if they want the big three they need to show you they are ready by following rules, keeping grades up and doing chores.


    Answer by higherboundmom at 10:37 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • higherboundmom, right on!

    Answer by writeon at 4:52 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • I agree with higherboundmom... now is the time when your kids need your guidance the most. but don't mixup guidance and officer-mom, boys will be boys no matter what you do, but showing them the "respect to trust them" way will always help them to make proper choices. I believe in the Harsh Reality of life plan. I would plan some sort of unannounced trip to an area/home/hospital etc, showing Harsh Reality, let them see first hand what bad choices can play on their lives. Tweens and Teens these days are subjected to WAY to much stuff and the closer to home they stay the better it is for them, and with an eye opening reality check they just may get it! cuz  tweens/teens out there HAVE NO CLUE! Good Luck


    Answer by AndreaRUJuiced at 7:46 PM on Sep. 28, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.