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Husband has admitted to needing help but where do I begin to find it?

My husband is SERIOUSLY controlling and jealous and he has admitted to needing help with it and he asked me if I can help him but I don't know how or where to begin... Did any of you ever experience anything like this? I love him and I don't want a divorce but it has seriously crossed my mind because I can't deal with it anymore. What did you do in a situation like this? Where can I get him help?

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Asked by nakoal87 at 4:45 PM on Sep. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Level 9 (273 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • It begins with a therapist to help him understand what it is that makes him feel like he needs to act this way.

    You either ask your family practitioner for a referral, or you look through the yellow pages to find one.

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 4:46 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • I am glad that he recognizes he has a problem and that he is willing to work on it. Good for him! If you have insurance you may want to contact the Ins. company and see if they have preferred providers. Otherwise look up counseling in the phone book and find a therapist that way, or ask your family doctor for a referral.
    Good luck, I hope all works out!

    Answer by MizLee at 4:51 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Counseling!

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:03 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Call a Family Therapist and see what they suggest.

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:16 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Good answers so far. You can gently bring it to his attention when he begins to show those behaviors so he has a chance to be aware of them before they get worse, or can talk about it - think about why he is having those feelings. But if your bringing it up to him makes him angry or violent - this is not the tactic to take. As juvenile as this sounds - reward moments when he stops himself from being over -controlling. Whatever you can reward he will learn to do more of.
    Both of you need to know what advice a therapist is giving, so ask to sit in on the first session and join for a follow-up once a month or so.

    You may have to stop doing activities that push his buttons for a while, things that make him jealous or suspicious and want to be controlling, to show support for his desire to do better.

    Answer by DogsMom at 5:58 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

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