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Can you be friends with someone who is the absolute opposite as you?

I've become friends with someone who is liberal, atheist, and a Democrat. I'm a Christian, conservative, and Republican. I try and keep an open mind about certain things, but I like how I am. Well, this friend always initiates debates with me and I'm just sick of it! We get along when we don't talk about religion or politics. I'm not out to change her mind or anything, she's happy with the way she is. I just don't know if we can stay friends if every time we are together, she turns everything into a huge debate! What would you do?
And please don't be rude to me just because I'm one of the above, like I said I'm not out to change her mind ever. I don't want the subjects to be brought up all the time!


Asked by Anonymous at 4:56 PM on Sep. 22, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • of course, if she is willing to stop discussing these subjects. I too am on the christian/conservative/republican side and have many friends who are not. We have friendly discussions, but if any of us feel that we are getting irritated/upset/defensive, we immediately stop the conversation. As long as you don't let her views influence you, i see no problem. How else can we witness to the unsaved if we exile them??

    Answer by alexsmomma06 at 12:00 AM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • Id tell her exactly what you just told us.

    Answer by Gealach at 4:58 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • just say thats a topic you dont like to talk about,tell her you find her great as a friend,but this part really stinks of her, so not to even bother talking about it.

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 4:58 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • well dealing with religions, i would think that would be harder. thats like God being friends with the devil. I think you can be friends with people with different views ie political, parenting styles, etc...but as far as her/him being a atheist, that goes against everything you believe in. there will always be a debate there regardless of the conversation. the bible says come out from among them. I would say becoming friends with people that live the same lifestyle as you is alot easier than being friends with the opposite. Not bashing any atheist...but im pretty sure a atheist wouldnt be bestfriends with a preacher.

    Answer by kiyad22 at 5:04 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Tell her how you feel. Be honest with her, just as she is honest with you.


    Answer by Cinnamon-mom at 5:06 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Just tell her how you feel... One of my dearest friends I met here on CM and we talk all the time by phone... she is a United Penecostal and I am a Wiccan-Witch... go figure...LOL...
    And we are simply upfront honest with each other and love each other for it.... we can spend hrs on the phone and have...LOL....

    If she is a good friend she will understand how you feel...

    Answer by gmasboy at 5:09 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Of course you can! Tell her there are certain topics hazardous to your friendship. Or agree to disagree!

    Answer by older at 5:23 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Sure you can. When I lived in the South I had many friends that are Baptist, Methodist ect... We all got along just fine, just we knew what buttons to avoid. You just have to be honest with her and tell her how much she means to you and there are some things that you will not ever see eye to eye on. Just tell her the truth, she will more than likely appreciate your honesty.

    Answer by pnwmom at 5:37 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • I am Pagan. I have friends who are Christian Hindu, Jewish, Buddist. I would have more of a problem finding any common ground with a conservative with my being a liberal . Maybe you can find a common interest. Yoga class, Movies, shopping, book club. She probably won't be your best friend yet you can have a friendly relationship. I lost my best friend when she found God and decided to surround herself with like minded people. Bigger loss for her. For I am surrounded by a diverse and unique circle of friends that bring so much to my life.

    Just make politics and religion/spirituality off limits. Warning it is easier said than done. Just make sure you follow your own rules. No talking of your religion or political views to her either.

    Answer by CelticFaerie at 5:52 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Just tell her point blank that you would prefer not to talk about religion or politics with her as it always seems to turn into a debate and those debates result in a strain on your friendship. You appreciate her friendship and her as a person but you will just have to agree to disagree on those two subjects and it would be best if they are not mentioned at all.

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 6:35 PM on Sep. 22, 2009