Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

domestic violence....

I am currently going through a domestic violence situation and dont know what to do. First off, I am 8 months preggo and my has assaulted me 2 days in a row. He has never put his hands on me before these last 2 days, and quite frankly i dont know where it came from.Yesterday, he was mad because he wanted me to go and fill out an application for Arby's, but didnt want to wait for me to wash the dishes first. The argument escalated, and he just ran across the room, to where i was sitting and got so close to my face that he headbutted me and bit me in my top lip til it bled. I then tried to run in the other room, and he followed me, and pushed me into my nightstand against the wall. He took my cell so I wouldn't call the police, said he was never leaving the house and as long I continued to argue with him, if I did, he would kill me. I waited until he left and went to the precinct and made a report, but they told me I ..

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:46 PM on Sep. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • TELL YOUR DOCTOR. They will file a report with CPS. Go to CPS.
    Go to the police and don't file a report, but say that he is harming you and your unborn child, you fear for your life, and you need him gone.
    K_Sawyer

    Answer by K_Sawyer at 8:53 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • call a shelter
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:53 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Leave him now. Once it starts, and you let him do this, it won't end until you leave. Leave now and shave yourself and your unborn child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:54 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • (CONTINUED) that I couldn't make him leave because the apartment we shared was also his living quarters. Well, he didnt know i filed a report and came back later that evening verbally abusing me. He told me I was a slut, bitch, that's y my mother is dead and so forth...The next day came and I was washing up our daughter in the tub, and he told me that my tires were flat, I said "i wonder how that happened", he immediately grabbed me by my hair and drug me through the house, slappin me in the face, sayin "u not allowed to get smart with me"...then he took my iron and threw it through our bedroom window. He then slapped me again...he finally left, after throwing his key back in the house, and threatening if I ever told anyone what happened, he would kill me. Well,I am stayin with my aunt , but I want to know is there anyway I can break my lease and get another apartment? He does not have a job, and I fear he might vandalize more
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:55 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • First and foremost, I want to applaud you for having the courage to come here and ask for help. Even if it's anon, to actually sit down and type it out is very good. Second of all, you need to call the police and press charges. Whether there are "bruises" or not, you need to press charges. The police HAVE to take a report, by law. If they refuse, talk to their superior. You want documentation on this. Third, get OUT NOW! Think about your relation, and I mean REALLY THINK. Guys don't turn into this overnight, they are always like this. Do you remember him insisting that you do things, maybe telling you what to do? Has he ever called you names and then tried to pass it off as a joke. And I mean names that HE knows will hurt? If he's willing to hit you once, he will continue. Now, you are not only responsible for you, but an innocent child. What would you tell that child if it were them? Now get up and do it.
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 8:56 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • I have been down this road before. If you need someone to talk to, please pm me. I'm happy to help. you are not alone in this, and don't think that you should settle for this. You and your child deserve so much more!
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 8:57 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • You are welcome to come here for some Guideance......You can always find this group with the following URL:
    http://www.cafemomAbout Guardian Angels
    NO DRAMA ALLOWED!

    We have ALL been through enough!

    This is a safe place that you can come to cry, vent or release your frustrations even if you are not ready to leave your abuser yet.

    YOU WILL NOT BE JUDGED HERE!!

    Everyone here from the Group Owner to the Administrators have once walked in your shoes.

    We are a very active and informative group.
    Please take the time to read this information & add to it in order to help others, also please read our guidlines and cafemoms, before group before appling.

    This is a support group.

    We are here for each other.

    We are here to let abused women know - YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

    THIS IS A GROUP FOR ABUSED WOMEN
    (by ANY family member)
    OR
    For Formally Abused W
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 9:17 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • If the police had arrested him in the first place for domestic violence the second incident may not have happened. Call a shelter and get the ball rolling on getting this man arrested and getting him help for his anger before he kills you.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:58 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Get to a safe place before something more happens to you and the unborn baby. Neither you nor your baby do not deserve that kind of hell or any hell. Get out now before someone is dead.
    jilligan362

    Answer by jilligan362 at 10:05 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • The similarities to our situations are so the same it's crazy. I explained to my landlord that a domestic dispute was taking place, and he let me out of the lease, no questions asked. Also, you can get an order of protection and just tell the police you are scared about where you will go, 'cause you can't afford the place on your own, but you don't want to be abused. The police can sometimes talk to the landlord for you and be pretty covincing. Good luck, message me if you need someone to chat with.
    Sharde88

    Answer by Sharde88 at 2:03 AM on Sep. 23, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN