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Need some serious assistance advice..fraud?

Times are hard right now for a friend who has an infant, lives with parents and does not have a sitter so that she can work. She originally lied and changed her address to another family members bc she was under the age limit where you can live at your parents address and still get assistance from the government (considered seperate after 22 years old.) So she has medicaid since pregnancy, and her son of course...she also has had food benefits since her son was born. She lied and said she had no idea who the father is b/c she did not want to go after him for child support in fear that he would get full visitation by himself. (He is very unfit to take a baby by himself, even I agree to this) Child support accepted her statement that the bio father was unknown. Right now he barely comes around, and he gives about 500 a month to her. My friends fear is that he will eventually want to get visitation whether to spite her or

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:23 PM on Sep. 22, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (13)
  • u have to Do what u have to Do Sometiimes all the Publiic help BS wants to help but never there when u really need them iim goiin throw that age stuff with them too but iim hiitting rock bottom still cant get no help they dont carre not worth iit
    Miszsamantha

    Answer by Miszsamantha at 11:25 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • have your friend email me.
    Arisce

    Answer by Arisce at 11:25 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • continued......or maybe he will grow up and be a fit father. She is afraid that if things to get sour btween them and he goes and files to get paternity established and then a visitation order, that her previous actions with getting state help will be discovered. It is not as though she should not be getting assistance, she needs it, and he can certainly afford the money he gives her. If the state knew then his child support would probably all go to pay back medicaid, and then he would have an easy time getting visitation bc the process of paternity would be established. So I do see her concerns, she is looking out for her child...but do you think she would get in big trouble? For lying that she does not know who he is and still getting cash or checks from him. ..I dont know what to tell her bc I have no experience with this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:26 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • I decided to ask on here after she had me read this little handbook, and it said any fraud can be 250,000 dollars of payback punishment. I was floored. She does not get enough to make it worth that. Plus she doesn tthink she even has insurance anymore, just her son. She is in night school so she can get off this assistance crap and provide for her son but even in 2 or 3 years if she does not need assistance she is worried that any time in the future if her babys father does file , they will look back and see if she was lying, and plus if he does file in the future that would mean things got bad between them bc right now they are relatively friendly as he never comes around anyways....and if things are bad she knows he could say she has lived with her parents (although that was during pregnancy she was under the age and now she is over the age limit so she can live with her parents and get PA)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:29 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • In order for HIM to get visitation he has to go to court and petition a judge that he is the father and PAY for a DNA test. Those run in the THOUSNADS of dollars these days and take months. Unless he has tons of $$ to throw away she has no worries about him trying to get support or visitation. So nice to see MY hard earned tax dollars pay for liars and cheaters and irresponsible parents who shouldnt have kids to begin with.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 11:32 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • True. she should check out how much it costs in this state to get a DNA test and petition....but I would like to add again that she does deserve assistance, you should be talking to the people who say they are homeless but are 30 year old men who want to be bums and have no children...( i know of a guy who does this living on his moms couch getting over 400 in fap and hes perefctly able to go and work) THOSE ppl are wasting your tax dollars. Not the women who are trying to go to school to get OFF of assistance and have had it for not even half of a year, plus my friend has only had to use medicaid to go to a few appointments , get an ultrasound, and have her baby, and now only goes to her babys well visits. she feels bad but what other choice does she have?? Id liketoknow bc maybe she could try that out then instead of always worrying about committing fraud.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:38 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Plus I cant stand when ppl say MY hard earned tax dollars, as though ALL your tax dollars went directly to that person...maybe 2 pennies....She did work since she was of working age, so where did HER tax dollars go? Now they are helping her out I would say its pretty full circle there.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:40 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • In order for HIM to get visitation he has to go to court and petition a judge that he is the father and PAY for a DNA test. Those run in the THOUSNADS of dollars these days and take months. Unless he has tons of $$ to throw away she has no worries about him trying to get support or visitation. So nice to see MY hard earned tax dollars pay for liars and cheaters and irresponsible parents who shouldnt have kids to begin with.

    Wow...pms'ing?? And how nice of you to judge someone you don't even know. Who says she should not have had kids? Is your real name GOD? Otherwise, STICK IT.

    I agree with what your friend is doing. You do what you need to do to take care of your kids.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:44 PM on Sep. 22, 2009

  • Just because you pay child support it does NOT entitle you to visitation. Two seperate issues. And on the flip side, you can be entitled to visitation & not pay your child support. Many moms think they can withhold visitation if the dad is behind on the support...NO...that is illegal!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:05 AM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • Wow...what I wouldn't give to get $500 a month in child support. That would have been so helpful when my daughter was still in diapers. I just don't see what the benefit of her getting cash assistance would be if she is getting $500. She does realize that the assistance will help her "find the father" and will make her go after support. Then she will have to pay all the money she received back.
    OneToughMami

    Answer by OneToughMami at 2:38 AM on Sep. 23, 2009

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