Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you think you enable your husband?

I know I do. I cannot get mad at him for not thinking to wash a dish or sweep the floor, because I have always done everything for him. I gather up his dirty clothes when he leaves them in the bathroom, I bring him snacks when he is in the living room, etc. He is apprieciative about everything though, so I do not think it is an issue. However, I do worry about what would happen if I ever become really ill or something. The house would be a mess, and the baby would be naked! LOL

Answer Question
 
EternalChild86

Asked by EternalChild86 at 12:02 PM on Sep. 23, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 3 (13 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I did that for the first week of living together, maybe. Then I realized I don't want a grown child, and he has no problem doing everything that needs to be done if I'm rendered incapable.
    Pnukey

    Answer by Pnukey at 12:04 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • Not nearly like I used to. It's a rare day that I put his clothes in the hamper for him. He has been known to drop them on the floor two feet from the hamper or not take his plate to the sink and I find it later after I'm done with dishes. There are other things but I say something like if you're done with that I'll clean it or something to that effect. I don't need another child to clean up after.
    wildflowers25

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 12:11 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • As a divorced woman and then a widow, I am now dating a man who can be very lazy (the word "man" must mean "lazy" in another country!), but when I was at HIS place, it was quite tidy.

    I would cater to him and do everthing (including his laundry) when he came to my place.

    Now I refuse to do some things.....I've asked him to hang the towels in the bathroom, get his own drink and NOT to bring any laundry over. Why?

    Because if we ever do live together I will refuse to do the things HE should do for himself! When was the last time he brought me something? Did MY laundry? Cooked ME dinner? Vacuumed my floor? Did the dishes after I cooked FOR him? I refuse to be a slave to anyone other than a child, and in that case, I would be in my "teaching" mode!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:12 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • no. i make him do it. if i did it all i'd be even more exhausted than i have been lately.
    dayziesnrozes

    Answer by dayziesnrozes at 12:13 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • No. His mom is. Even though he's a 32 year old man, she still cooks/cleans/washes his clothes. GRRR! I'm trying to get him to do his own sh*t. Or at LEAST help me! But because his mom is an enabler, we fight because he thinks I should have to do everything.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:15 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • My husband has figured out that neither of us is always on top of the chores, thus if is isn't done all the way, do or get what you need and more on. But he doesn't baby me and I don't him much. He gets baby in the fact that I am used to doing a lot of things with out him and being a military wife it is a necessity. So he gets baby in that he can deploy and know that everything will be taken care of at home, no matter what. 

    DevilInPigtails

    Answer by DevilInPigtails at 12:18 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • Yep, I sure did.
    WindyTheWidow

    Answer by WindyTheWidow at 1:19 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • In the beginning of our relationship I did enable him. But I was blessed to the fact that he still did not become lazy. I remember when I was at his place, and he had to go run an errand, I folded his laundry for him. When he came home he was very surprised, and told me he could have done it himself. Now that we have children, he knows I have enough to do, so anything I do for him, he is very appreciative of. Other people ask him why I don't do everything for him, and he will flat out tell him...she's not a slave, she is my wife, my partner, we work together. If it doesn't get done, there is always tomorrow :).
    TCamacho

    Answer by TCamacho at 6:00 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN