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Do you have pre concieved notions about "Teen" moms?

I am so tired of people looking down on me for being a young mother. I had my son a month before my 16th birthday...seven years ago. I was talked about then, and unfortunately even though its been 7 long years I still get the stigma that comes along with being a "teen" mother. I am a very good mother and I worked hard to make a life that my son can be proud of. I put finished school and am working in nursing.

I just want to know if the older moms think that they are better than me just because I had my child a little bit sooner than they did.

A mommy is a mommy no matter the ages.....Im not going to post annonymous because I want you to realize that I am a really mommy just like everyone else on here and just b/c i was 15 doesn't mean that I was a slut, or white trash. It means that I am just human...and unlike God I make mistakes.

but ....my little man is the best thing that ever happened 2me

 
mandy0510

Asked by mandy0510 at 6:58 PM on Sep. 23, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (16)
  • Amen! I didn't have a child at that young of an age. I was 24 when I gave birth to my son. But I get so angry at people who think that they are better then others because they had kids at a later age. Good for you taking good care of your son. The girls that make me mad, are the girls who can't take care of their babies and or don't want them... And that goes for any age. Just because you were 16 when you had him doesn't mean that you weren't capable of taking care of him. There are people in their 40's that can't take good care of a child.

    NAT24ROXY24

    Answer by NAT24ROXY24 at 7:02 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • I swear I just read this post, someone else wrote it but it was the same thing.

    There should be a Teen Mom Category!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:00 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • I am a teen mom too! I have gotten this a lot too.. Even though I was 18 when i had mine.. He is the light of my life and sometimes i feel like hes the only guy i will ever love.... :)
    Mamakat90

    Answer by Mamakat90 at 7:01 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • no i do not believe "older" moms are better. I believe its the person makes how good of a mom they are if that makes sense. I was watching a show the other night and it had like 6 women who had sex... no condoms.. and got HIV. It just shows that "older" people are not making wise choices either and they should not be so judgemental. I felt bad for them but I was just like come on... ya'll are going to be on here talking about have a one night stand or etc and then have HIV and then preach to teen sex. Just shows how judgemental the world can be. Focus on you and your precious one. sorry i went on and on ;) but i hope that makes sense
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:03 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • well I wouldn't say I am an older mom but I will say that I never look at teen moms different than other mom's. My best friend was 11 when she got knocked up and 12 when she gave birth. I personally have seen what it does. I usually just feel sorry for the mom to lose her childhood. I don't assume that teens made bad mom cause some do and some don't just like older moms.
    Thruthfully I think that I wonder how she is gonna cope.
    heather.darin

    Answer by heather.darin at 7:03 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • I dont think all teen mothers are unfit. But ive known my share of people who have babies in High school and then complain that they missed out on everything. I think those mothers have no room to complain when they knew what they were doing. Now not all teen mothers do that! All though I do think it's not a fair position to put their parents in either. Now if they do it all on their own. Good job to them!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:10 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • Until I was faced with the reality of it, I will admit I judged them. Then I found out that DH was born when his mother was 17. She must have done something right because he is one HELL of a good man. Now I look more to their support base to see if there is something wrong there when I see one who is sinking.
    auroura

    Answer by auroura at 7:14 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • I admit the stats on teen Mom's are pretty scary-however- MOST of the teen Mom's here on CM seem to be the ones trying to beat the odds and to you I say- Go for it! There are many teen Mom's not doing the right thing BUT there are a lot of any kind of Mom not doing the right thing. Bad parenting knows no age, income, race, whatever....to me moving forward and doing the right thing is the name of the game! If you are a teen Mom your job may be harder, but it does not mean it is impossible...keep on keeping on!
    wildboyz1994

    Answer by wildboyz1994 at 7:15 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • Yeah there was a similar post on this topic, however the mom was a teen, and this OP is an adult who had a child when she was a teen. And I answered the teen mom in the other post, and I'm not sure if the girl realized i was actually on her side. Couldn't tell if her reply was to me or the person who answered after me but she sounded rather ticked off.

    IN any case....I don't judge a teen mother. A baby is a blessing no matter what age you have it. If you are providing for a child and doing the best you can to raise them right, age is just a number and I don't think it's a pre-requisite to make a good parent. hell, i've seen some mothers at 30 go out to bars, concerts, parties and leave their kids alone. Work all day, go out all night and there sit the children with pizza or mcdonald's for dinner. I've known a couple of teen moms and dads who are AWESOME parents.(friends of my son) They are very responsible and loving too
    CinderAmethyst

    Answer by CinderAmethyst at 7:21 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

  • It doesn't matter how old you are when you become a mother, it should just matter that you do you best, there are probably a handful of teen mothers who give everyone else a bad rep. probably because they decided to go a long with having the baby even though they were not ready to grow up, they are still selfish. I had my first when I was 19, I don't think anyone I knew looked down on me, I think everyone felt sorry for me, like I was throwing my life away,
    Rachel24517

    Answer by Rachel24517 at 7:27 PM on Sep. 23, 2009

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