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Husband isn't turned on by me anymore......what to do?

We've been together for about five years, just recently married. It seems that he's not turned on anymore, or just losing interest. We have sex so much if you put all the days together on average it would probably be as if we were married for 12 years. He loves me but started losing his erections about 6 months ago. What I mean they don't last as long and before we made love for up to five hours at a time and now maybe 1-2 hrs. So I wondering if anyone has any thoughts. I do dress up in lingerie, role play, etc.


Asked by Anonymous at 10:10 PM on Jun. 23, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • It could be a lot of things:
    1.) Is he overweight? Does he have circulatory problems?
    2.) Is he stressed or overtired?
    3.) Does he feel a lot of pressure to perform?
    4.) Does he seem concerned about this issue?
    A physical and some routine blood work would help with some of these questions. You definitely need to talk to him to try to get a better idea of what's up. If the visit to the doctor doesn't clear things up, there are a million things you can do to improve the relationship. Sex happens every bit as much between the ears as it does between the legs. Yes, even for guys!Good luck to you!!

    Answer by musicmom77 at 12:41 AM on Jun. 24, 2008

  • have him go to the dr. he might have a hormonal problem. and other things can mess the sex life up also, like stress, or overly tired.

    Answer by cokalea at 10:13 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • This is a really common problem among men. Usually it is caused from a physical condition. He should talk to either his family physican or a Urologist. So many women feel like it is there with him in a loving and gentle manner and express your desire for him to be checked out just to be on the safe side. take care!

    Answer by MommasCooCoo at 10:23 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • You mean 1-2 hours a session isn't long enough??? I'm good with a little oral stimulation and maybe 10 minutes of actual bow-chicka-bow-wow!! Maybe he's tired. :) As mentioned above, communicate. It may be something very simple and he may not even know something is wrong. Or he might not know how to bring it up. Hope you both get what you want!!

    Answer by suneebeach at 10:37 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • I feel like I'm not doing something right. We've had the best sex in the world but now, it has been getting harder and harder to keep him hard. I know he's tired and has high blood pressure but he's on meds. and I ask him if he's still happy and he says he is totally happy, but then why??? He was always harder than a rock coming in the door and now, I can't even keep it hard giving him head. I'm scared, very scared.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:09 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • Its probably the blood pressure meds. Tell him to talk to his Dr. about the problem (1-2hrs would not be a problem for me!) He can change the meds or give him something to counteract the "not as hard" symptom. Good Luck!

    Answer by kymom2boys at 11:40 PM on Jun. 23, 2008

  • maybe he is more tired due to work? or doesn't feel so hot about doesn't nec have anything to do with you.

    Answer by unga at 1:08 AM on Jun. 24, 2008

  • The blood pressure meds. may be the problem. My husband went on them an did notice a difference in his erection. Come to find out, the amount he was taking was too high. The Dr. reduced it and all is fine. Is your husband having any lightheadedness? That's another symptom that his pressure is too low now.

    Answer by suneebeach at 10:24 AM on Jun. 24, 2008

  • It may not be you at all. Talk to him, there might be a physical or emotional issue he's having. If he doesn't know what it is or how to correct it, have him head to the doctor.

    Answer by handsomebabyj at 12:58 PM on Jun. 24, 2008

  • He's not over weight, he works very hard but is in great shape for an older man. He doesn't have a emotional problem about his ability to preform and loves sex in every way, but we're still having the issue and I'm starting to think he might be having an affair since he works out of town a lot with his construction crew.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:03 AM on Jan. 13, 2009