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punishment for not doing homework?

What kind of punishment would you give? My 4th grader has "forgotten" homework 3 times this week, forgot her folder for 2 days and in the folder is her order form for school pictures tomorrow. Today, besides her homework (some of which she can't do because she didn't bring her folder home), she has to write 50 times: I must do my homework, from one of her teachers. The other day she had to go to another classroom to do her homework that she forgot.
She just doesn't care. She went from being a straight A student in 1st and 2nd grades to mostly Bs last year and this year she is destined to be a C student. Only because she won't do her homework and refuses to study for any test (she's failed 1 quiz already).


Asked by justanotherjen at 4:38 PM on Sep. 24, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 26 (28,174 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • I have had this issue and there were a few things I've tried. The teacher and I kept a running notebook of what was due and what was for homework and such. My son read it so he knew we were both on the same page. I have gone back to school to get my son's homework because I refuse to let him miss work. I've always made him write out "I WILL NOT FORGET MY HOMEWORK" numerous amounts of times. Now, I make sure he comes home does him homework and I check it, as much as I can and then he gets to do what he wants. I have had to just recently not allow any games of any type til the weekend and that is after all homework is done and chores are done. I'd also talk to the teacher. GOOD LUCK!!!

    Answer by fireangel0310 at 9:29 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • I have a 12yo 7th grader, an 8yo 3rd grader and a 6week old baby. Over the years we have found that rewarding grades is more effective than punishing for homework. However, to get the grades obviously you must make them complete their homework. Your child is a 4th grader, so he/she must be around 9/10 yrs old. You should be MAKING the child sit down EVERY DAY after school to do homework BEFORE being allowed to play... then they are rewarded for getting good grades. Make it a habit. Good habits start with mom and dad SHOWING them... MAKING THEM... take charge mom!

    Answer by JAXX55 at 4:47 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • I had a son like this. Our rule was if you don't have time to do your homework, then you don't have time for entertainment activities. We put our son on a weekly progress report. The office provided it, although he had to remember to pick it up every friday. His teacher filled it out, let us know if he had any missing assignments, and what his grades and behavior had been that week. If he brought it home completed, he had his privileges, if he was missing assignments, he had no video games or television until the next Fri., if he didn't bring it home we treated that as an incomplete assignment.

    As he got older we continued to deal with this challenge, & our feeling was if your privileges were based on the responsibility you took. If you want to be able to stay up until a certain time, then you better be taking care of responsibilities equal to that age. If you want to drive then show adult responsibility, do your homework.

    Answer by ohwrite at 4:50 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • Every child is different. We actually started with rewards, which worked for our other sons, but the one son, preferred not to do the work.

    He was very bright, and sometimes I think it was just too easy for him, but his teachers did try to give him challenging assignments. (Something else you might want to consider). anyway, good luck!

    Answer by ohwrite at 4:52 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • She's already had all her privileges revoked. She doesn't get to watch TV, we took her DS away months ago because she was sneaking it up to her room and playing until 10pm or later on school nights. All her toys except like 3 Barbie dolls and a couple stuffed animals (all those are shared with her little sisters) were taken away. She doesn't go outside to play after school. Most days she sits at the dining room table from the time she gets home until she goes to bed at 8pm. Some days she skips dinner because it takes her that long to get through her homework. Then, because she's so wound up, she screws around and stays up until 10pm and is tired the next morning.
    It's a never ending battle with her.

    Answer by justanotherjen at 4:55 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • it may just take some more time. how long ago did u take everything away? You would think eventually she would get tired of just sitting at the dining room table night after night doing nothing!
    Is her friends not asking her to come out and play? Is she missing out on Bday parties and fun events? If it is this bad yet she is ok with really truley doing nothing at all. My daughter started this and I went a bought a new laptop, not much wrong with the old one, just needed an up grade for school - well when i told her it would just sit there as a large paper weight till i saw her grades go up - they turned around real quick like.

    Answer by roxyann76 at 5:21 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • Grounded. She just gets to sit bored until she can remember bringing it home. Also if you pick her up. Ask her for her folder and homework right away. Then you have a chance to go get it. Make her ALWAYS bring it home. Ask the teacher to write you a note if there is no homework.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:53 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • My first thought is "what as changed, what happened". It sounds like something is going on, something other than a case of the "I don't want to's". Keep with the pushing and praising, but I'd make an appointment with your ped just to make sure there is not a physical reason and then see if there is someone at the school she can talk to.

    Good luck and hang in there.

    Answer by littleredpony at 9:39 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • My 6 yr. old always says she forgets her homework well I now pick her up so she usually gets it the teacher walks her put and I make sure she has it! If she loses it or forgets when going home with a friend then her teacher doesn't give her recess and throughout her recess they make her write I will not lose/forget my homework again....and her dad and I don't let her watch TV and she isn't aloud to have friends she either has to sit in her room and clean it or go to bed at 6:30 for 3 days!, Write me if you need something!


    Answer by Coolmommy1 at 11:21 PM on Sep. 24, 2009

  • OK, my daughter did this in 7th grade but because she got too caught up in her JR High attitude. I will tell you that removing and punishing does not work as I tried that and she rebelled even more, told me well I cant do anything anyhow! Then when we did try to give her some freedom she would manipulate us, do well for a week to get what she wanted then bomb school... It is a tough situation but the only best thing you can do is, say here is the punishment if you have these grades, and these are privileges if you have these grades, and here are the awards for having these grades. I know it's frustrating but the goal is to try and encourage them to want to raise their grades on their own, not just a matter of punishment. Pay more attention when they do - do homework, you'd be amazed a lot of kids just like having praises by parents for doing the right thing.

    Answer by TheFriskyKitty at 11:51 AM on Sep. 27, 2009