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DH just quit his job Again....

My Dh works for his dad which is hard for him sometimes because they fight and I understand that, but he yells at his dad and then quits. I don't care if he wants to find another job but he needs to find it before he quits. He has done this several times and ends up missing like a week of work (which we can't afford) and then goes back to work for him. It has been happening more and more lately and yesterday was the worst fight yet. DH says he is "over working" and he is just going to stay home with the baby. First of all i do work full time but my income could never support us and second he can't even handle being left with our 4 month old for 1 hour, how does he think he can do it for 9? I just am stuck and don't even know what to say to him? He needs to grow up and work, that is life, nobody loves that they have to go to work every day but he has a family to support . Any suggestions on how to deal with this situation?

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Colie68

Asked by Colie68 at 11:51 AM on Sep. 25, 2009 in Relationships

Level 3 (22 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • After reading this I feel like my DH sounds like a young kid, just so you know he is 32 years old. Not 18 like he is acting.

    Colie68

    Answer by Colie68 at 11:53 AM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • Let him do it for a week and see how badly he misses work then! Just let him know, you can't afford for him to stay home. He needs to work it out with his father or find a different job. He's lucky enough as it is that his dad has been letting him "quit" and then come back so often.
    MommyLee08

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 11:54 AM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • No suggestions. Just sympathy. My 30 year old husband acts like an 18 year old too. He quit his job recently that resulted in us having almost $700 a month MORE in bills than we did before. His excuse? "I cant handle working like this". The company WAS a pain to work for, but you dont quit your job that you are making $2K a WEEK at because "you cant handle it" when you have a wife and kid at home with one on the way. *sigh* what are we going to do with them?
    MommaTurbo

    Answer by MommaTurbo at 11:57 AM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • What a dumbass, and he sounds immature!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:58 AM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • I think I'd tell him exactly what you just said, and I'd let him know that if he doesn't get a job, you refuse to support a grown man, and you'll be leaving. With the baby. He definitely needs to man up.

    I'm pretty traditional, so I know I could never live with a stay at home dad and support him, even though I have been a sahm mom for many years. I have no problem with other couples doing that if they both are comfortable with it, and the woman earns enough to support them. I would also be more than willing to go get a job if my husband didn't make enough to support us, and have during different points of our marriage. It may be difficult for your husband to work with his dad, but then he needs to find another job.

    Good luck!
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 11:58 AM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • Give him time to cool off. Tell him to take a few days off to calm down then to look for a new job. Tell him you appreciate the thought of him being willing to be a SAHD but tell him that if he's with the child too much then he might not see time spent with the baby as quality time anymore and that's important. (yes that is bs but we're trying to deal with a man!) Remind him how valuable he is to the family as a working member of the family and that the recession isn't over and that he's needed to help provide.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:04 PM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • I just don't know when the cycle of quiting is going to stop, if ever, and it stresses me out so much, the back and forth and not knowing if we will make rent next month because my husband can't suck it up and work. I did tell him this morning if he doesn't work than he doesn't deserve a family and we will leave. It is my dream to be able to be a SAHM, I hate having to go to work everyday but I do because it's what needs to happen. I wouldn't even feel comfortable leaving him with the baby for a whole day, I wish I did because he needs to see how much work it is but I just don't trust his temper. Thanks for the advice ladies, I really needed to vent and get others opinions on this.
    Colie68

    Answer by Colie68 at 12:10 PM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • I agree with what you said OP. If he an't handle providing for his family, then he really doesnt deserve one. Give him a deadline. He needs to choice which is more important....sucking it up and working and keeping family, or whining, not working and losing his family. If I had to work at a job I hated just to provide for my daughter, I'd do exactly just that. She is more important than HAVING to have a job I enjoy. I think having a job you enjoy is a luxury. And if you basically have a gaurunteed job (working for his dad) he's a dumb@$$ to keep risking it like this. His dad is going to get fed up one day and he'll get no more chances.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 PM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • If it is OK for a woman to stay home while her husband stresses about how to support her and the child I don't see why he is the bad guy for wanting to be home. Get a second job like so many women on here tell their husbands to do so they can be home.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:26 PM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • I WOULD TELL HIM TO PULL THAT DAM TAMPOND OUT OF HIS ASS ! ! THEN TELL HIM TO QUIT ACTING LIKE A 2 YEAR OLD AND STAY WITH THE JOBE ! !
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:03 PM on Sep. 25, 2009

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