Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How can I cope with my boyfriends 1st baby momma?

She loves to start shit and control situations as much as possible cause she has a kid with him. She will make him feel bad if he doesn't do wat she says and he will come back around me and have an attitude and take it out on me. We have a new baby comin about 2wks and he just seems like he is so scared 2 tell her he needs a break cause of wat she might say or do. How do I deal wit a man that lets his pass keep running his life just cause she has a kid wit him? They were never boyfriend and girlfriend and he has been doing for his son since the dna test and since she has dropped him off and told him 2 take him she didn't want the lil boy.

Answer Question

Asked by ond_rea at 11:18 PM on Sep. 25, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • get custody and screw her live your life and avoid her

    Answer by mirit.rose at 11:23 PM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • I agree...get custody. You can get it from abandonment by the mom. Then she has no say so and gets no money.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:27 PM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • Well she already has tried to get child support frm him but he aint paying it. I told him b4 she did it that she was gonna do that an had went an found him a lawyer but he didn't even wanna purse it and get custody cause he thought she wasn't gonna do that and told me I didn't know wat I was talkin bout. It is getting to the point where I haven't even been wanting 2 interact with the lil boy because he always is doing something bad and being a brat@6yrs old cause of wat he has learned frm his mom. She now keeps him 4 the week while he's in school and we get him 4 the weekend and than we get him 4 the summer while she takes care of her other 2 kids. Since I been wit him we have never had a break and she always makes sure she gets a break. Wat kinda mom is that? No 1 told her too have kids and keep trying 2 use the system and drop your kids off cause u don't want them.

    Answer by ond_rea at 11:37 PM on Sep. 25, 2009

  • It sounds like he just has to step up to the plate and tell her what's what. If he is ok with how she treats him and the child then I'm not sure there is much you can do.

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:06 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • your husband needs to stand up to her,and u should kill the boy with kindness and teach him the proper way to behave or at least what is expected of him in your house, otherwise only time will heal and solve all these issues stand strong mmake something positive out of it

    Answer by mirit.rose at 12:20 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • You deal with it and accept that the child comes first. You made the choice to have a child with a man who already has one. A man who was so careless to have one with someone he wasn't even in a relationship with. Now you have to deal with the consequences.


    Answer by Chrissy629 at 1:10 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • you have a full keyboard, please use it. "wit" is not a word, it's "with"

    To answer your question, he needs to get this taken care of in court. If the two of them can't act like adults, the court needs to step in and act for them. He needs to have regular visitation and child support ordered. The only one this hurts is the child with them acting this way.

    Answer by heatherann0221 at 3:26 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.