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what would you do in this situation

My husband and I just had a baby. Well he works all the time now with his new job prmotion which i understand and dont have a problem with. But when he is home he is ALWAYS on the computer. We never hangout anymore. Yesterday he was suppose to be off well he went into work because one of his workers got sick he came home at eight in the morning. Until about 10:30 he was on the computer then we had sex he fell asleep, then got a call around 1 had to go into work because and auditer was there came home at 4 then got back on the computer got off to eat dinner around 6 then got back on til about 10 and went to sleep. Yesterday was the first time i have seen him all week because he has been out of town for the job training. I just want to spend time with him but he is always on the computer, playing stupid games. Im just getting very lonely.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:39 AM on Sep. 26, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • my husband plays his computer game A LOT too! (damn world of warcraft!) and he works midnights only sleeps for like 6 hours, but when he is awake this is all he does! so i just ask him to spend some time with me! i tell him that game is going to be there regaurdless, and if he doesnt want to then i do the whole reverse thing. when he wants attention and stuff i act like im just waaaay too busy doing what i am doing to spend time with him. he got the picture real quick! lol
    danette624

    Answer by danette624 at 7:37 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • If it is unusual for him to be on the computer so much then I suspect you both need to talk. Having a baby changes things, and often the first thing to fly out the window is communication. My husband and I never talked about things after our son was born, and now years later, we are finally discussing everything that got ignored or unaddressed in our marriage. If your dh is like mine, he turns inward when something is bothering him. He expected me to understand, but I am not a mind reader. Vicious cycle, huh?

    Sit down and don't complain or preach, just tell him you are feeling weird and somewhat lonely. Ask him how he has been feeling since the baby was born. It may help him to open up if you demonstrate honesty as well (such as i love our child but I miss the times when we....). Remember, you are a mom, but you still have needs. Don't bark at him about the computer either. I suspect it is an escape.
    bellaheart42

    Answer by bellaheart42 at 8:04 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • Have you told him this? When you have time go and sit with him at the computer. If he asks why your in there. Just tell him why.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:24 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • confront him on it ask him if he wouldt mind limiting his computer time to an hour a day (which is mor ethan enough) even consider going on an electronic fast together for a week, no tv, no computer for one week. I do this with my husband when we start to disconnect and it always reminds me of why i initially fell in love with him
    katiekruschke

    Answer by katiekruschke at 11:18 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • I'd paint a friggin monitor on my chest and a keyboard across my cooter and tell him now get on THIS COMPUTER BIG BOY!
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:46 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • HAHAAAA admckenzie

    i think im going to do that! lol he would get a kick out of that!
    danette624

    Answer by danette624 at 4:54 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

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