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Underage drinking and stupid parenting....

I posted a question here last week asking how moms on here feel about underage drinking. I was surprised at the answers I got. Seems most cafemom's are ok with their teenager drinking at home, the feel it is safer, and that their kids will not binge drink or become alcoholics because they as parents allowed them to drink at home. Really????? Because a study was done recently that surveyed almost 300 college freshmen and compared their drinking habits to their parents' attitudes towards alcohol. Those students whose parents never allowed them to drink -- about half of the group -- were significantly less likely to drink heavily in college, regardless of gender, here is the link

So, I think the cafemoms relaxed attitudes about drinking, is because most moms on CM are young and have very permissive attitudes...basically,, what do you think?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Sep. 26, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (8)
  • I think it's a crock. Regardless of what parents do or don't do, these kids are going to do what they want anyway.


    Answer by Anonymous at 10:55 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • I kind of have a mixed opinion about it. Obviously I would never condone my son drinking underage but I'm a realist and I know that he probably will...I did. I also had several friends who's parents let us drink at their house. We had to give them our car keys and no one was allowed to leave once we came there. At those events, I don't recall anything ever getting out of control. However several times I drank at high school parties where no one was home. About 95% of the time, kids got way too drunk, several people drove home after drinking, and tons of other crazy things happened. So looking at it that way, the parent's allowing us to drink but being in control of it was actually better for us. Now will I ever allow my son and his friends to drink here? Probably not...but its going to kill me knowing he's probably out somewhere else doing it and I won't know how responsible him and his friends are being.

    Answer by Ash9724 at 11:02 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • I have 2 sisters. The three of us where raised in the same house with the same rules. I didn't drink until I was 20 (it was legal because I was living in Germany at the time). My middle sister is 24 and has never had a drop of alcohol, and my youngest sister started drinking when she was 18. Basically, a person is going to do what they want to do. And just so you know, most of the states (except for 6), do not have a drinking age. 21 is the BUYING age. As long as you are in your parent's house and you have your parent's permission, a teen is allowed to drink an alcoholic beverage- Legally. Just because the law says I can doesn't mean that I will. I think a lot of the decision will factor into how my child is behaving, and if he is doing good in school. I have no problem with parent's making the decision in their home.


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:08 AM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • I guess that would be true if parents are buying their kids a case of beer every weekend.  My dh and I don't drink very often but when we open a bottle of wine with dinner on holidays then we allow our teens to have a glass.


    Answer by beeky at 1:35 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • This is why I turned my computer on today: To get some input on the drinking thing. We are in the process of planning the Senior 2010 trip. We chose to not let our kids go to a country ( Bahamas/Mexico) where the age is 18, for several other reasons as well. However, where ever they go( in the us) they will be able to get what they want. I just hope its not that easy & its not a priority. My soon to be 18 yr old is not interested, he just wants to have a good time. I of course will still be a wreck the entire week he is gone. I do believe that the age is determined mainly because the human brain is still developing in the teen years & alcohol can slow or damage that growth.

    Answer by kimba10 at 10:38 AM on Sep. 27, 2009

  • We are parents for a reason, and therefore it is our job to lay out family values and morals into our homes and into our children. While OTHER teens might be doing a lot of things, to me does not make it OK and oh well let em do what they want, I DO NOT AGREE with this state of mind or attitude. My teen often tells me, well my friends are doing it, and I will reply saying, well are your friends raised in a valued based home? Most times they will say I don't know and I will say well then, we are not like your friend's family we have values and morals in this family, and there are some things we do not agree with, drinking underage and breaking the law in my opinion is not an acceptable thing to be encouraging teenagers to do. I am not a parent that will be allowing my teen to do something just cuz other parents want to teach their kids to be careless in their decision making.

    Answer by TheFriskyKitty at 11:30 AM on Sep. 27, 2009

  • um... it depends on the parental attitude towards drinking which I bet was not factor. For some reason "Americans" tend to lean heavily towards extremes. If they drink its for getting drunk.
    I was raised that drinking was fine in a social setting. It is part of being a cultured person to know about diff drinks and liquours and wines. But bad manners to get drunk....
    I was taught AT HOME to learn my limits, likes and dislikes and how to handle myself if I was drinking.
    So were most of my closest friends. We were allowed to drink at parties in our home or each others homes and all our families had a rule that if we wanted to drink we could AT HOME, the result....
    I can count on the fingers of my hands the times we went and "drank" at the local teen hangouts (and NONE of us ever got drunk there). NONE of us became major drinkers or tended to ever get drunk even as adults.

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 12:28 PM on Sep. 27, 2009

  • We all treat alchol as something to enjoy, savor and respect. Something that has its time and place.
    I plan to raise my kids the same way.
    My brother did not have that same exposure to that attitude that I did (as some of the older relatives passed away etc) and his drinking habits were diff than mine.

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 12:32 PM on Sep. 27, 2009

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