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Why do I get treated like crap all the time!

I am 20 and I still live at home with my 14 month old DD. It's time to move out. My dad is so horrible to me and it's always over the dumbest and littlest things. He takes me car away and just threatened to spank me! WTF. I'm not a child anymore and I know that I don't act like it. The way I react to things is part of just how I am and I also react to what he does. I can't believe he said that to me. If he dare lay a hand on me...omg. I hate being treated like this. I'm sure it goes both ways. Then he brings up "I pity whichever man marries you" I've been with my boyfriend for over 2 years and I've never ever treated him the way my dad and I do. His personality is totally different. My dad and I just clash. My problem is, it just seems to get worse. And I am just drained from it all. There is a fight at least once a week with him. And it's over the SMALLEST things. It stresses me out, I'm drained, I feel like I can't say...

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:40 PM on Sep. 26, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (20)
  • anything to him without him blowing up on me. It's like I'm walking on glass when I'm near him. I think his favorite football team just lost. Sad excuse to treat your daughter like shit huh? I dont know what to do anymore. He's told all our family at diff times to go to counseling for whatever reason, but when we say soemthing to him he thinks he never does anything wrong. Except he hurts us..all of us. (He won't even apologize for things like "hurting our feelings") It's so ridiculous. I think I'd be happier if I didn't live here. :( I dont know what to do anymore
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:42 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • It sounds like it is time to move out.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 3:46 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • If he puts his hands on you then have him arrested. He won't do it again. At 20 you need to be working on living on your own though. I know I wouldn't stay and be treated like that. Maybe he is doing that to push you to get out of his house.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:47 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • I'm in EXACTLY the same position as you. Like, spot on! The only difference is im 18. But my daughter is 14months too lol.
    I'm trying to move out, but its so hard, my dad takes all my money as "rent" and that makes me stuck here, yet he'll say shit about me still being here??
    VonWiggles

    Answer by VonWiggles at 3:47 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • Move out and get on with your life, it's as simple as that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:48 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • yeah I know what you mean VonWiggles. He takes my car away yet if my boyfriend and I have our wedding in the same state as most of my family then he will give me my car as a gift. I don't feel that taking shit away from me when im 20 years old is going to help. And esp threatening to spank me. Thats just crazy. I almost said if you dare lay a hand on me ill kick you in the balls so hard u wont be able to walk for days. But no..I held my tongue. I'm just so sick of being treated like crap all the time. He really says hurtful things to me and it's ALWAYS ALWAYS my fault. Never his. He always says "i'm your father, I'm allowed to do this" I said i dont care if your my father or not your not supposed to treat your family this way!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:50 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • sounds like your dad needs serious couseling but it will be hard to get him to go...is there any reason you have to live with him? you seem young but you have a child of your own and maybe that is part of the problem.....start looking for your own place and employment if you dont have a job...try to get on with your own life.
    michaux

    Answer by michaux at 3:50 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • I wish it was that simple....I'm tryin to move out by January...I just want to NOW.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • Wow. I can't even say that to my dad! He goes to work, comes home. If he had a bad day, I'm fair game to take it out on. If he's had a good day, and I think he's approachable, he acts like whatever I'm saying is wasting his time and "yeah yeah yeah" attitude. He speaks to me like I'm 3 and like I can't comprehend anything no matter how much he dumbs it down. He's called me fat before, WHILE I was pregnant. ??
    And yeah, he's never threatened to spank me, so that would just probably make me laugh like "wtf did you just say? Really?"
    And it sucks too, because it's always been just my dad and I. My mom's nuts and I don't like her anyways, she's not here.
    So it makes me feel bad when I think so badly of him, and then he's nice out of nowhere. It makes me not know what to do?
    VonWiggles

    Answer by VonWiggles at 3:56 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • Get help from the state they will help you with a home child care and a job and you can get on food stamps. It might suck at first but it will get you started in the right direction. You need to be out on your own. If your grown up enough to have a child your grown up enough to figure this out. Sorry to say.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:02 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

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