Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

i need help, wahts wrong with me?

what is wrong with me? Why cant i settle down? Part of me wants to, my bf and i have been together for over a year, and hes been the dad in my sons life ever since. He wasnt working and ddint have a car so that was hard, then recently he is getting both. We split for like 3 weeks and i saw someone else, but i missed my bf i wanted him. But i think about other men, and dont want to settle down because i enjoy flirting and hanging out and just having fun. ( no sex involved) settling with him is like my dream, but why cant i do it? whats wrong with me?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:29 PM on Sep. 26, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Maybe you just need to grow up.
    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 11:36 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • I do not think that there is anything wrong with you..

    There are plenty of grown people that just do not want to settle down.

    You need to be open and honest about this to your BF....
    IMO he has the right to know...
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 11:37 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • im pretty grown, thanks.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:38 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • How old are you...there are people in their 40's that are still not
    grown up...so try not to take that the wrong way...
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 11:39 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • don't take it the wrong way, I'm not saying you are immature, you just need to realize what's important to you useless flirting or being confident with the women that you are, open your eyes and realize you have a man you love and loves you back, don't let that get away cuz you can end up lonely. Just my opinion don't get offended cuz those are not my intentions.

    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 11:47 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • there are tons of people that are not ready to settle down and do it anyways because they think its the right thing to do.. they dont think about what they themselves need at the time. society has all kidns of pressures especially after there are kids involved. you should definitely voice this to your BF, but know that he is obviously going to be hurt by this. but also understand that you dont have to feel the pressures of getting married or whatever. Face it, you arent really ready to be married. thats ok. maybe you are scared of the commitment of settling down with one man right now. but that is something that we all have to face. I am married and all married [well, and unmarried] people have to face that. but if you love someone and cant see yourself with anyone else and they are good for you... and you are good to them, then why would you want to go to anyone else? you know what im sayin? you just have to think yourself...
    AmyJoost

    Answer by AmyJoost at 11:50 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • out of going elsewhere when you start to have your doubts. everyone gets this way in long relationships at one point or another. everyone has rough spots and if you are young it may be harder... but if this person is the person you love and cant stan to be away from than you should care enough to let them know you are stuggling and they will be hurt but understand and help you get through it. maybe you will grow closer together... you arenot necessarily immature. everyone has these issues. i am married and i still deal with these insecurities too. dont think there is something wrong with you. just know that this is part of being in a relationship and that it is something you have to deal with.
    AmyJoost

    Answer by AmyJoost at 11:53 PM on Sep. 26, 2009

  • What's wrong is that you may have AGED...but you're still MATURING into the person you will be. There's nothing wrong with that! You haven't reached that point of settling down yet. And there's no point in settling down till you have, because you'll feel like you've missed something and make yourself miserable.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:19 AM on Sep. 27, 2009

  • Either way, whatever makes you happy, I agree that he has a RIGHT to know and you need to open with people about your needs and wants. You can't drag people along, nobody should be or wants to be hurt.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:26 AM on Sep. 27, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN