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Does anyone have this fear?

I am a new mom to a wonderful and perfect baby boy. I am 28 years old and did not plan this pregnancy. In fact, I had him after my doctor said I would never have children and had two miscarriages. I truly believe he is a miracle and so perfect. He is already sleeping through the night at only three months. He was rolling over at three weeks and sitting up by seven weeks. Every night, when I put him to bed I go to sleep with this nagging fear that something is going to go horribly wrong, like I'll wake up and it will have been a dream or something worse. I am happy every moment with him but I can't stop the fear from coming back every night after he's asleep. Do I need to see someone or is this a normal thing that will pass?

 
jessflynn

Asked by jessflynn at 6:23 PM on Sep. 28, 2009 in About CafeMom

Level 9 (363 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I think a small amount of fear is totally normal.  Especially after all you've been through.  I've had 2 healthy babies and I'm getting ready for baby number 3 and I still feel the same fear I felt when they were first born.  I can't even imagine what I would be like if I had been through what you have.  I think the biggest thing I would worry about would be "this is too good to be true".  It's not.  Your child is doing awesome and obviously everything is fine.  Crap happens but maybe you should let yourself enjoy your child and not worry so much.  You deserve it babe.

    Katrina3016

    Answer by Katrina3016 at 6:28 PM on Sep. 28, 2009

  • It's hard to tell from your description. Some moms with postpartum depression have these fears but you don't say anything about being depressed. Some moms have trouble sleeping with their baby in another room. If he is sleeping in another room moving him to your room may help.

    Some moms have these fears when there is something wrong with the baby. They know somehow there is something wrong. If you think this may be it, ask the doctor to take extra time checking your baby.

    Some moms have these fears if they are having problems forming attachments to the baby. Everything may work itself out as the baby gets older. Or it may help to talk with someone.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 6:32 PM on Sep. 28, 2009

  • I am like this, still, my DD ist 16 months old and I STILL do that. I will wake up in the middle of the night and go check on her. I freak out that she is going to drown in the bath tub, or we are going to get in a car accident, and everyone will be fine except for her. I have had anxiety attacks because of it, literally getting no sleep at night. Trust me, girl, it isn't just you.
    Tiera12

    Answer by Tiera12 at 6:33 PM on Sep. 28, 2009

  • It is pretty normal as long as it doesn't run your life. I've also got bad news. My own biological 'baby' will be 23 on Wednesady, is married and I STILL worry. The only difference is now it's a phone call. It isn't that I didn't worry about my oldest, just that we nearly lost him 3 times the first 9 days after his birth. Every night of his life that he slept at home I had to look in on him before I went to bed. Like I said..as long as it doesn't disrupt your life dopn't sweat it.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 6:58 PM on Sep. 28, 2009

  • I have definitely felt that way. I have weird fears like someone crawling in the window and taking them, a car hits us and something bad happens. I have weird fears like about when they grow up, my one kids is a total cutey and I wonder if someone will hurt him just because they're jealous. You know... really "stupid" stuff.
    firenicecream

    Answer by firenicecream at 8:25 PM on Sep. 28, 2009