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I need some advice, please!!!!!!

Me and my husband got in a huge argument. He came to me and ask, is there someway we could work out something, so dad can stay here part of the time.
I said Whats wrong with your dad is he drinks(alcohol) and doesnt eat. I told him that wasnt fair to me. I work at home, I have a computer job. I clean the house, wash cloths, cook, and take care of the kids, they are in school, but they are very active and I do alot of running. His dad is only 55, he is an alcoholic. I told him, that I would go to his house and help him clean and cook and take him places and to the doctor. But, I just didnt wont him staying here, because he would eventually just move in. I dont wont that around my kids. Am I wrong? Why do i feel terrible?
Please any advice is helpful.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:11 AM on Sep. 29, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • It sounds like you have been more than fair by offering to help your Father in Law in his own home. It lends more privacy for all concerned. I don't know about your state...but in Ca, through the State Department of Health and Human Services we have a program known as In Home Support Services. If his Dr believes it is medically necessary, the state will pay $11.00 an hour for someone to provide care in his home, including Dr appts etc. That person could be you, your hubby, or someone else. If you don't have someone in mind the state has a registry, and can send someone to interview. It may make it a little easier to add that kind of workload to your day if you got paid, or alternativly if you could arrange for someone else to do it. Good luck, it's a hard postition to be in...I wish you the best
    Cheapsk8mom

    Answer by Cheapsk8mom at 9:17 AM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • No you are not wrong for how you feel. If you let him come to stay. You are just excepting and helping his addiction. It is not your fault your FIL is an alcoholic.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:32 AM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • You are not wrong and you feel guilty because it's your husband who is asking for the favor. Your husband probably agrees with you but feels bad for possibly having to tell his dad no he cannot stay. I don't have any advice, sorry. But it's one of those situations where someone has to lose.
    Queentdi

    Answer by Queentdi at 6:57 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

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