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Should this be ok?

I don't have many friends and the ones I do have that have childern just aren't into being a parent as I'm. I have a male family friend known him since I was 10 (i'm 30 now) he is a SAHD. I have only meet his wife once and he his meet my boyfriend just once. We now live very far apart. Recently he called to chat about an online game we play. We talked for 3 hours and only talked about 2 things the game and the kids. It was really nice to talk to someone who gets excited about there kids. I just worry about this causing drama my boyfriend can be jealous but he does really like this friend, I don't know how his wife will feel about it. Would you be upset with your husband if he had a close female friend. I don't even feel like he is a friend I feel like he is family, he even called my mom , mom and she called him the son she never had

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:19 AM on Sep. 29, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • I still think you gotta be careful what this leads to even though you wouldn't do anything to hurt anybody. You already mentioned that you're worried about your boyfriend could be jealous about you talking to him on phone so it's probably not a good idea to do that again. Think about who is more important to you...before you do it again.

    Answer by ocsosomom at 11:31 AM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • My husband is still very good friends with one of his exs. They parted ways over ten years ago and still talk a few times a week. She and I are friends now too. I have no problem with it. I also have a good guy friend that I talk to every week. He even comes to hang out with us on the weekends sometimes. My DH and him are good friends now too. I trust DH and he trusts me so neither of us have issues with friends of the opposite sex.

    Answer by Carajust at 11:34 AM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • Jealousy has always been a hurtle for me, so my husband and I have an agreement...that my friends will be his friends too, and vise versa (especially when they are of the opposite sex). It makes me feel better to know that the friend knows me, and who I am to my husband (or the other way around with my hubby). Maybe the next time to you talk to your old friend try to include your hubby in the conversation, put the phone on speaker so your hubby can talk to. It's worth a try! Good luck girl!

    Answer by B-rit_32506 at 11:37 AM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • You may also want to build a facebook account or something like it...and be open with Hubby about what you are chatting about etc. If your husband still doesn't like the idea of you chatting with a man, even a stay at home dad man try to find out why.Don't be angry or hurt when you ask him, but try to find out "why" it bothers him.Does he feel it's a lack of respect on your part? Does he think the other guy is really trying to steal you away? Does it make him feel bad that he can't be the guy you are connected with about your child? Those are just suggestions by the way.Whatever his reason may be, even if it sounds stupid or far fetched, it's the way he feels. You may be able to soothe his feelings about it, maybe not, maybe down the road he won't care. For the time being though, I think you should lay off the calls until you KNOW how DH feels about them, so you don't feel like you are hiding something.

    Answer by Cheapsk8mom at 1:09 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • I have a general rule for myself:
    Avoid anything that could be intepreted as inappropriate.

    That way, you're always covered. I don't do this because my DH is jealous, he isn't. It's out of respect for him.

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 3:20 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

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