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Please as many ladies as can answer this one!!!!

My husband and i have been married for 3 yrs and are ready to TTC!!!! Were excited but also scared! im sure this is normal to be nervous but theres one thing in particular that im worried about! we have a great marriage and love being together as much as possible! im worried that a starting a family will cause this to suffer. I know we wont have as much alone time as were used to, however we also cant wait to have a family and a baby of our own! Does a baby bring u even closer? Im i worrying for nothing? Is it possible to still have time to urselves?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:12 PM on Sep. 29, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (6)
  • Yes, it is totally possible! You might have to set "dates" but its worth it!!
    MommyLee08

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 3:13 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • Having a baby does put a stress and strain on the marriage and you can't go and do as you please like you do now and be alone just whenever you want, BUT it is possible and everyone does it. Do you have family nearby that can help when ya'll need alone time? If so, use them to do this b/c you need it. Also just be committed to one another...it's a marriage and a new baby will be apart of your family. You and your husband just have to make sure you make time for one another.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:14 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • First every couple is different so take what replies you get with a grain of salt. Having a child can be stressful. You'll be sleep deprived. You'll be overwhelmed at times. You'll have someone demanding and needing all day long for many years to come. There will be less "me" time and less "us" time because kids take up a lot of the calender. :) BUT, it is totally and completely worth it. My DH and I were married for about 5 years before my son was born. Was it stressful? Sure. But you know what? I love and admire my husband more today than I did before kids. He's an amazing father and I find that incredibly sexy. We can't pick up and just do whatever whim hits us...but we have much more to warm our hearts at home. We have two individuals that represent the best of both of us. What could be wrong with that? Don't go into parenthood thinking it'll be "us, plus." Go into it realizing it'll be a whole new adventure.
    ldmrmom

    Answer by ldmrmom at 3:28 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • Babies are hard work and can break marriages. But the ones that break weren't all that steady to begin with.

    A good marriage can make it through everything. Sounds like you have that variety, so time to worry about something else. **smile**
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:37 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • it's normal to have these feelings, everyone does! my husband and i didn't find out we were pregnant until I was 18 weeks along (i had been having previous cycle problems) and we hadn't even been together a year. we were planning on marrying anyway, and i always knew he was the one, but a baby came a lot quicker than we had ever planned.

    our relationship is much different now, we're young still (i'm 21, he's 27) and our lifestyles are much different but we absolutely love our new family and the people we've become. We also read a book while i was pregnant, "When Two Become Three Nurturing Your Marriage After Baby Arrives" by Mark E. Crawford, PhD. This may help you get an idea of what will change in your marriage, but every couple is different.

    My pregnancy alone brought the two of us so much closer, i loved it when he could feel the baby kick. And now we've blossomed into great parents. Good luck in your decision :)
    1st_time_mom23

    Answer by 1st_time_mom23 at 4:11 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

  • My husband and I have been together for about 5 years, married for a little over a year and now have a 7 month old. And it has been amazing! I love seeing him as a father and feeling the ultimate connection with him. To have alone time does take extra work, you do have to plan a little bit more, but as long as you tell him how you're feeling (because believe me afterwards you will feel not as great about yourself at first) you will be fine.
    arinesmith

    Answer by arinesmith at 6:32 PM on Sep. 29, 2009

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