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What was your thought process behind trying to commit suicide? What changed to keep you from trying it again?

I am curious because one of my friends recently tried to kill himself. Granted he wasn't nearly in his right mind after coming down from a weekend long drug binge, it is just hard for me to understand the thought process. He is alive and hanging on, if you want to know more read my journal from today, but when he wakes up, if he still has any cognitive memories, will he think to himself, "Damn, you mean I have to try again!?!" For those of you who've attempted and survived, what turned your life around? Please share some encouraging stories. (Yeah, I know, not a fun question at ALL, didn't know where else to put it.)


Asked by WindyTheWidow at 11:06 AM on Sep. 30, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 5 (87 Credits)
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Answers (12)
  • I have tried twice and obviously didn't manage it either time. The first time there was a lot of stuff going on and I had not been happy for MONTHS. I was on anti-depressants and I didn't know at the time that right at first they dont help, they just give you more "Umph" to do things, it takes a few more weeks after that for them to actually make you feel better. I was breaking down in tears all the time for no reason and I didn't even remember what happy was.
    The second time was with PPD and the doctor took me OFF anti-depressants to see how I would do. I lost my job because I literally could not get up and go to work. The day I tried, all I could think was "three days ago was bad, yesterday was worse, I cant take it anymore if today is even worse." Then I had a big fight with my best friend and started taking pills. Luckly my DH found me before too long and got me help. With the RIGHT treatment I am fine and off pills now.

    Answer by auroura at 11:44 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • Well, I haven't tried it but it used to cross my mind all the time. I have a chemical imbalance in my brain and it causes me to have severe depression and anxiety. When I get very low and I get meds that aren't working anymore its hard for me to find any reason in the world for me to be here. Even though I have a great wonderful supportive family. Sometimes those feelings of worthlessness are so overwhemling and unless you've suffered from deperession or traumatic episodes in your life there's no way someone could every understand it. My spiritual beliefs keep me from every trying but my mother tried to kill herself 4 years ago and it is very devistating. She has a family and husband and grandkids that love her and her thought was that we all would truly be better off and she considerd herself a burden cause she can't work. And she's FAR from selfish in every area so really. Some people will never understnad it.. Me either !!

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 11:10 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • i am so sorry that this happened I remember when I tried to kill my self I was 3 months preg and just had been beat and raped for 8 hours I could not even look in the mirror so I took a lot of pills and wrote good bye letters and went to bed next thing I knew I was in the ER getting attention they tied me down to the bed and pumped my stomach it was the worst 2 days of my life but I thank God I am here and my baby lived I was selfish and regret it every day Good Luck


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:12 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • Well, years ago, before I became a Christian, I used to take anti-depressants. I'm not sure I truly ever had a chemical imbalance because I came off of them over two years ago and haven't needed them since. I think I personally was self-medicating when I didn't need to because I lacked God in my life. (Not a judgement, I know several Christians that NEED antidepressants, DF is one of them, just speaking for self.) I can honestly say that after my husband died, if I didn't have a firm foundation in Christ, I would've probably found a way to die. I'm not sure I would've killed myself outright but there are many ways to do it other than directly. There are miles between actually doing it and having thought about it. I can understand, and yet I CAN'T. I half heartedly tried when I was about 14 by taking a palmful of aspirin and washing it down with vodka, I just spent the night throwing up and didn't try it again.

    Answer by WindyTheWidow at 11:17 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • I'm so glad you are still here Anon 11:12, may God bless you the rest of your days and your precious baby, too.

    Answer by WindyTheWidow at 11:19 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • My mind was sick. I basically gave up and saw NO other alternative. What kept me from trying it again was the fact that it didn't work the first time (I took that as a sign that I should live) and my family all standing around me when I woke up. I had hurt them so badly, but they were still there waiting for me to wake up.

    Answer by MommyKKay at 11:20 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • Oh, MommyKKay, I pray that is the case with Charlie. Clearly you are both still here for a reason!

    Answer by WindyTheWidow at 11:22 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • I'm so glad you are still here Anon 11:12, may God bless you the rest of your days and your precious baby, too.

    Thank You he is 10 and doing great your firend will be in my prayers.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:22 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • I just kept thinking I can't believe I was raped again, this will always keep happening to me. It will never end..........I was drunk, tried to slit my wrists and woke up covered in my own blood all over the bathroom. I was also starving myself and at that time made it down to 92 lbs. I was so sick at the time I would look in the mirror and think " I'm not anorexic because anorexic people are skinny" it was a bad bad time in my life. If you saw me today you would never know, never guess. I really don't even know who that girl was, just a sad broken little thing

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:27 AM on Sep. 30, 2009

  • I know a couple of people who succeeded at suicide. One was physically ill for years, literally, and surgeries and chemos had run their courses - he felt - and maintenance meds were no longer maintaining. He felt it was the only way to stop his physical pain after such drastics illnesses. His immediate survivor is suffering horribly, he shot himself. The other person I know shot himself also leaving survivors behind and the 'shame' of suicide burdening them all. He suffered from longterm severe depression and felt worthless in himself and unworthy of others' love because he himself didn't love himself. I know that both people thought about suicide for a long time. I don't know if either tried and failed suicide before succeeding. I do know both suffered emotionally and physically in themselves for years years before 'success'

    Mental illness is physical illness. Don't know how it can be stopped. sigh.


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:30 AM on Sep. 30, 2009