In parenting: What do you think the difference is? Do you ever think they go hand in hand?
So many people want to respect their children and don't want their children to fear them. Sometimes it seems like a fear of the children and no respect for the parents.
Asked by Anonymous at 1:51 PM on Sep. 30, 2009 in General Parenting
Answer by Anonymous at 1:53 PM on Sep. 30, 2009
This is a really good question. But I don't have an answer, lol. I think maybe it's about finding a balance and what works for you as a parent. I have spanked both of my children but I've found that (through many mistakes, of course) talking to them sternly hurts worse. I don't mean "down grading" them. Just explaining that something is not acceptable. I flinched whenever my parents moved too quickly so I go by that also. When I "jump" at my children, they laugh because they know that I am going to tickle them, etc. They don't freak out thinking that they are getting ready to be spanked. We've found our balance. They respect me, I respect them. I listen to them, they listen to me. I hope I'm understanding the question, lol. ;)
Answer by Katrina3016 at 1:56 PM on Sep. 30, 2009
Answer by JamiDesigns at 2:09 PM on Sep. 30, 2009
Fear implies physical danger, possible fear of being killed. Respect just implies that you respect the boundaries. Example Respecting the police because they can put you in jail. Fearing a criminal because they might actually shot even if you do cooperate. My children hopefully respect me because I can take things away from them or if necessary spank them. But I'm not going to kill them or even send them to the hospital. I'm not illogical, I'm not a drunk. I'm not an abuser. But I do have authority and I will punish them. So they need to respect that.
Answer by Anonymous at 2:28 PM on Sep. 30, 2009
Answer by rkoloms at 3:36 PM on Sep. 30, 2009
Answer by keyaziz at 3:40 PM on Sep. 30, 2009
I think people often respect out of fear. I guess it depends on one's definition of fear. Fear of disapproval is a good one. Fear doesn't have to constitute impending bodily harm. But it isn't always unhealthy for a child to have a healthy fear of their parents- a fear of disappointing them or a fear of discipline isn't bad imo.
Answer by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Sep. 30, 2009
Answer by KLBrown at 4:26 PM on Sep. 30, 2009
Answer by MotherofIreland at 8:59 PM on Sep. 30, 2009