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confessions of an uneducated mother

Oh my my my.... last night was freshman college night at the high school. There was so much information on what needs to be done in the next four years... and there I sat... having no education myself. I felt like and ass.... like a failure.... like Im not a good example. I know it is my child's life and that my child needs to do what it takes to go to school but I feel soooooooo much pressure to help her get into a college since I blew that chance myself. I had so many opportunites that I wasted, so many things I could have done that I didnt. I love my life now... but think of all the things I could have done. I dont want my child ever to feel that. My kids are embarassed when others ask where we went to school.... I hate that they have to say my mom never went. Im one of the only women I know who is uneducated.... and I hate that. I am never asked if I went to school... but where did I go to school.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:43 PM on Oct. 1, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (19)
  • If someone asks you where you went to school I would just smile and tell them that you didnt have the opportunity but you are working so that your girls do or something like that. You probably think they think more about it than they do. If you seem ok with it, then people will be ok with it. Where you went to college doesnt define you and you can still have a happy life without it. In todays wolrd i think it is great that you want your child to have it,but you cant change your past. Hold your head up and know that in the grand scheme of things where you went to college is a small part of who you are as a parent.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 12:51 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • You have nothing to be embarassed about. You write very well. Go back to school now! Go to a community college, local college, or enroll in an online program.

    If you are interested in the medical field there are lots of two year programs. When you are done you can become certified or registered and make good pay. You don't have to go to school full time or work full time when you are done. Since you haven't gone to college you may be able to get grants to pay tuition, books, and maybe even extra free money!

    Adults usually do very well when they go to college. It's not unusual for women in their 30's and 40's to be starting out. Just do it!
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 12:52 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • Ria7 - thank you... sad part is, I DID have the opportunity... I wasted it.

    Gaill - thank you... I will not go back to school. I have chosen a life path (sahm) and will not change our life choice for an education. AND the money is being saved for them not me.

    I appriciate the kind words. I did this anonymously I guess so I could let out my true frustration. I do hold my head high and many of the people I know are shocked that I never did finish college...LOL.. many thought I was an attny in my working life...LOL.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:56 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • My mom never continued her education either but i dont see anyone treating her like an idiot. My mom is verry smart and she has a good job. Dont worry about not going to school. Alot of people dont.My dad never went either. And they are not ashamed of it. They were able to provide for both me and my sister and that is all that mattered to them. They both have great jobs that pay well so they dont care. Colege is more of todays generation more then any other one. Now it seems like you cant get a job at walmart without a dagree. but it was never like that before. Like another poster said you could still take classes. Thats what im going to start doing next month although i feel i should have done it a year ago but i dont care that i havent started my schooling and if i cant do it then fine im happy just raising my son. And by the way just because you dont have a dagree dosnt mean your not educated.
    Shelii

    Answer by Shelii at 1:04 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • I agree with the other posters that you should hold your head high and be proud of what you are doing and have done (being a great mom being at the top - among many other things, I'm sure). I just wanted to add that you do not have to help them with the work to help them. What I mean by that is that if you are involved and supportive it is the best help you can give them. Also as far as helping them get into a good college you can also encourage and support them to work w/their highschool counselors to explore all of their options. They are lucky to have you as a mom and the whole world benefits from a good Mama so keep up the good work!!
    momrocks1000

    Answer by momrocks1000 at 2:21 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • You have nothing to be ashamed of and clearly you are not uneducated. Just share your experiences with your daughter. Tell her you regretted ruining your chances and you dont want her to make a mistake like you did. In that way, you are a good example. You grew up and realized what you had missed out on.

    But never think you are not good enough to be among the other parents. You've dedicated your life to being a SAHM and that alone is a 24/7 hard job.....and totally worth while.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:56 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • listen, my sister is a millionaire and never went to college. I went to college and only make $26/hr. i just posted this somewhere else, lol. Dont feel bad. college doesnt make who you are. you sound educated and i'm sure your kids love you regardless. my dad never went to college and he took care of a wife and 5 kids. so, chin up.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:36 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • If it makes you feel that bad, then go back! They have all kinds of programs now! If you dont want to go back, the hell with them! dont let it get to you!
    forevermom75

    Answer by forevermom75 at 4:47 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • Take it and turn it into lemonade. Making your kids work a little for their own education with your support encouragement is a recipe for success. Best wishes!

    3gigglemonsters

    Answer by 3gigglemonsters at 5:47 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • If someone asks you where you went to school you just tell for your dream job you didn't have to go to school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:08 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

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