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Do you really love your second baby as much as your first?

ok i know everyone is going to say yes ;) or at least i think so. but it seems so hard to believe. when i think about having a second child, i am always thinking about how it will take time away from my 1st child, and then i think how horrible that is, and get scared that i won't love my 2nd child as much. i just imagine myself loving my son and then wishing i didn't have a second child because s/he is just getting in the way of my time with my 1st.

:) any advice, experience? how did you feel having your 2nd child? did you really love him/her just as much as your 1st?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:54 PM on Oct. 1, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (42)
  • I thought that too but really you do love them the same. Or at least that is me. The only thing is the time issue. I am so busy with my baby that I have to work hard to find the time for my eldest. We do a lot of quality time while my baby is napping. And I have him "help" with her. He brings me diapers sometimes or stands at the sink while I'm bathing her. A mom just has to really find the time.
    wildflowers25

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 12:58 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • i'm PP. yes that's something i really worry about. that i will be spending so much time taking care of a newborn's needs that i won't have time for my son. and i looooooooove spending time with him. he's so much fun.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:59 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • Yes. And my third and my fourth. You find different things about each one that you just love. The way they smile, the way they laugh, their over dramatic reactions to things. Include the sibling as much as possible in caring for the new baby. And if you need to, make one day a week a special mommy and me only for the first one. Put dad on baby watch and just you two go to the zoo or something. It's a little awkward at first, but things fall into place. The great thing about love is the more you give the more you get. It keeps growing. Good luck with the new one.
    2autisticsmom

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 1:01 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • Actually my third is my favorite ;-)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • I love my second and my third and my fourth as much as I did my first. Having another baby will mean that neither of them will have the one-on-one time you get with your oldest, but I think that kids get a lot of out interacting with their siblings, too. There's always enough love to go around in a family.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 1:06 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • I love them both, but I cried at the guilt of "neglecting" the 1st one and felt really bad for wanting another one for a LONG time. Probably a year or two....
    lig

    Answer by lig at 1:09 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • ilove them both!! but they both can drive me insane!! i love my lil girl she ismy princess. and my lil man is awsome love his blue eyes. ilove them but equally. i do give more attention to one but ds is 7 mts. but dd is very helpful and she helpsme take care of her baby brother. i make sure i leave time for me and her during the day and so does dh
    piwife

    Answer by piwife at 1:11 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • Yeah I really do love my second just as much. I just think my heart got bigger
    Alexmykid

    Answer by Alexmykid at 1:12 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • I was scared about that (and that I wouldn't love my SS the same as DS#1 as well.) The thing is, you do love them. The love grows so much and you can't believe you ever had doubts. The older ones do silly things that make you smile and the baby does things that make you smile too (even if you saw it before from the other kids.) Every child is different in personality, so your love is different for every child. It's still there, though.
    Kenre

    Answer by Kenre at 1:28 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

  • i love both my sons the same.....they are my world..how can you divide that up.....my heart is theirs
    Mamaof2boys0709

    Answer by Mamaof2boys0709 at 1:34 PM on Oct. 1, 2009

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