Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What are your thoughts on out of the country adoption?

I'm watching Oprah and she has all these families that adopted Liberian children. I of course think that every child deserves a loving home. I just don't understand why all these people and all these stars don't adopt children here in the United States. There are so many needy children. What are your thoughts or feelings on this?

Answer Question
 
Jguevara

Asked by Jguevara at 6:17 PM on Oct. 2, 2009 in Adoption

Level 7 (185 Credits)
Answers (29)
  • i am not exactly sure who told me this,some one on cafemom, but adopting in the states isn't as easy as it looks. i think she said that there's a lot of problems between foster care system and adoption agencies. you should look in the adoption section of Q&A.
    Bernie19

    Answer by Bernie19 at 6:20 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • It is a lot harder than it looks, and a lot of families get their hearts broken because of it. If you adopt out of country it is a lot easier, and a things fall through a lot less.
    Tiera12

    Answer by Tiera12 at 6:27 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • I'll agree with the other two, but I did adopt in state, thru foster care. Royal PIA! would I do it differently? no, I helped a child within the USA and I firmly believe that helping our country first is primary, I buy American whenever possible (with some exceptions), I do always check to see where things have come from. I like knowing that my child a United States citizen from birth and that I was able to be the one to help guide her through the roadblocks of life. Just my Op.
    pattecake

    Answer by pattecake at 6:35 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • Oh pattecake, I totally agree with you, it is just that it is a big reason a lot of people adopt out of state, that's all!
    Tiera12

    Answer by Tiera12 at 6:45 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • I always assumed it was because they wanted infants; not older kids.

    Isn't it way more expensive to adopt out of country??
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:39 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • Oh goodness...
    1.) It is NOT easier to adopt internationally.
    2.) Most celebs are not eligible to adopt domestically or from foster care
    3.) It is such a misconception that there are so many needy kids "adopt ready" in the US. More than half of the children in the system here will never be available for adoption since TPR is not signed or the state has not severed rights.
    4.) Seriously, being a US citizen from birth is that important? Did you know that my daughter was a citizen from the moment the plane touched down here in the US? She was 17 months old... do you really think that I can't guide her through life because I missed her first 17 months of life? That is the silliest reasoning I've ever heard against IA ever.
    5) Did you know that every state has different laws regarding adoption?
    6.) My biggest thing: It is nobody else's business how someone decides to build their family.
    Continued...
    mcginnisc

    Answer by mcginnisc at 7:47 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • I don't question why someone decides to have biological children, or whether they have a natural birth, epidural or c-section. I don't question why someone adopts domestically or foster to adopt or even my friends that don't ever want children. It is none of my business...Period.
    We decided at 16 to adopt internationally on our first date. After 7 yrs of infertility, and then a stillborn, we discussed it again. Neither of us felt like we could foster a child and then relinquish that child after losing a child ourselves. We did not feel like it would be in the best interests of the child. We then waited 2 years to begin the process and then it took us another 2 years to adopt our daughter. FYI- the wait for an adoption from China is currently 42 months. The last referral batch was for March 22-2006- March 24, 2006. They are averaging 2-5 days a month for referrals. There are over 30K dossiers waiting currently in China.
    mcginnisc

    Answer by mcginnisc at 7:54 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • I am an adoptee. I was in the foster care system from the time I was 4 ad was adopted at 7.I STRONGLY believe that more people should adopt children from right here in the US. If my parents had decided it would be easier, cheaper, or more convenient to adopt out f the country then I would probably have been in the system my whole life. There are children living within miles of you who are desperately in need of a permanent place to lay their heads at night and desperately in need of someone to love and care about them. I also aupport adopting older children. They need a fresh start in life just as much as babies. My children are 3 and 9 days and if my husband and I decide to ave more children we WILL adopt an older child who just happened to get the short end of lifes stick.
    KaireasMommy

    Answer by KaireasMommy at 9:43 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • Amen, Mcginnisc! OP - you have a lot of options available and will need to decide what fits your family best. I don't think any path to adopting a child is easy. Maybe it shouldn't be, because you have to be really sure that is something you want to do. It is well worth it. Good luck!
    Iamgr8teful

    Answer by Iamgr8teful at 10:46 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

  • I think every kid deserves a home and it shouldn't matter where they were born.
    DEpley

    Answer by DEpley at 10:49 PM on Oct. 2, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN