Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do some parents

really find it hard to say no to any request their child have? No matter how outlandish or even against the rule? Do you feel your child has to have everything to be a good parent?

Answer Question
 
ssnelson26

Asked by ssnelson26 at 11:54 AM on Oct. 3, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 7 (169 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Um I don't
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 11:56 AM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I feel that my job as a parent is to set limits for my children and to teach them to learn to set limits for themselves. I think too many parents are trying to be friends with thier kids and this is not what kids need. When my kids are mad at me , I know I'm doing my job as a parent.
    writeon

    Answer by writeon at 11:59 AM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • Eventhough it is hard sometimes, I do say no. But there are times I give in out of guilt. Kids are master manipulaters and we as parents have to teach them to make that into negotiation skills and sometimes accepting that the answer is no.
    goaliemom93

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 12:13 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I don't think setting limits is bad, and I think that giving your child everything is a problem. But I also think that parents who say no for no real reason make no sense. DH and I occasionally do that where one of us will look at the other one and as "Why?" As long as there is a reason (too expensive, too noisy, too time consuming, ect) I don't think its bad, when someone does it just to set limits, it doesn't make sense to me.
    auroura

    Answer by auroura at 12:15 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • Not me; I'm the hard ass in the house. DH is the softie who will cave at the "Oh but pwweeeasse" or the tantrum just to make it end. Why he'd rather then deal with my tantrum from him undoing my hard work is beyong me; lol
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:51 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • "when someone does it just to set limits, it doesn't make sense to me. "


    So say everytime you go to the store your child wants a toy; some $1-$3 piece of junk; but they really really want it - you get it for them regardless? I'm not trying to be snarky; I'm honestly curious. How do you teach them restraint? Self control? Respect for their belongings and the value of them?

    We can't afford to buy a trinket every trip to the store; even a $1 one. But even were we Donald Trump rich; I'd like to believe my feelings would be the same. We teach them that they have to earn things in life. (Birthdays/holidays do not fit into this discussion) But if they want a toy just because they saw it on tv or at a friends or in the store; we talk about what they can do to earn it; even if it's just simple things like picking up the play room X# of times; etc...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:56 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • If I say no, I try to make sure there is a reason for it. Pretty simple. I don't say no just to get her used to being denied. There are plenty things she can't have for valid reasons and I want to teach her reasoning and fairness.
    jus1jess

    Answer by jus1jess at 2:30 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • No. Kids need rules. I told my kids that when I went to "Mommy School" the I was first in my class for the word "No". :0)
    Robsmommy

    Answer by Robsmommy at 6:53 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I have no problem saying NO to my kids or grandkids. It's not like they are going to trade me in if they don't like it.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:32 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I have no problem saying no and they DON'T get an explanation.
    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 7:56 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN