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nees advice for a 10 1/2 month

Ok so my son has gotten into a bad habit of smacking, pinching, and biting if he doesn't get his way. He get's so mad if I don't let him touch my cell phone (we have never allowed this) or touch our computer (he's never been allowed to touch that either). I was wondering what are some ways that I can teach him that it is not ok to do these things. I read somewhere that it is he's wanting attention, so i have started giving him more attention, but there are times (i go to school full time online) that I HAVE to be on the computer. Does anyone have any advice on what I should do to get him to stop having such a bad attitude when he doesn't get his way?

 
Zacherysmommy08

Asked by Zacherysmommy08 at 4:54 PM on Oct. 3, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 3 (20 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I agree with the redirect method. Giving my son something else to play with or focus on is always better. If I take away my cell phone and say no, he throws a fit!! Holds his breath while crying and slams himself on the floor! But if I take away the cell phone and hand him one of his toys that I know he likes, it will totally distract him and he won't throw his fits. Or I sit him in front of his bag of toys in the living room. He will drop the remote, or cell phone and play with the toys that he is allowed to play with.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:02 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • Put it out of his reach? Use the computer while he is napping as much as you can? Make sure someone is there to play with him / distract him / give him attention when you're using the computer? Get him something to do - like a walker (even if he can walk, many babies like walkers) or exersaucer? Get him his OWN little computer and cell phone to play with while you play with yours (IE: they have little toy lap tops at Target etc.) and tell him "no you play with YOURS" - make it desirable by playing with HIS a lot first.. and finally give in and be like "ookayy you can play with it!" That is all I can think of right now.
    JamesAndMe

    Answer by JamesAndMe at 5:28 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • Oh and, he will never not have a bad attitude about you playing with something and not letting him touch it until he learns the word "HOT" or "NO" and understands it (and even if he does - he might still throw a fit. They seriously have very little control over themselves, but luckily they get over stuff really fast at these young ages so you can distract them!) .. then you can tell him stuff is HOT .. of course be aware that my mom did this with me and then later on I would freak out about her touching the hot stuff. lol And when I learned no I'd repeat it back to my mom and do stuff anyway.. heheh

    I have a 7 month old by the way. So my parenting advice is second-hand and based upon theories so .. don't quote me darlin!
    JamesAndMe

    Answer by JamesAndMe at 5:33 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • Redirect, redirect, redirect.  Redirect is only thing that you are able to do at 10 months.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:34 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I know how you feel. I go to school full time online and have a 11 month old that just got out of that stage. First, I made sure I gave him enough attention while he was awake. I pretty much do all my schoolwrk during naps and at night. If he bites, pinches, or hits...immediatly say, NO BITE or OUCH and put him in his crib for 10 mins . Keep doing this EVERYTIME. he'll catch the drift. I realized when my DS bit me later on that it was a sign that he was tired. Be consistant in disipline. It is to build bounderies and is very important. They will never know the difference between right and wrong unless you show them the way.
    Amberoz

    Answer by Amberoz at 7:51 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • ive always taped my little ones hands and say no loud, i dont hit hard just enough to were it hurts there feelings and then let them cry,my little one doesnt even cry anymore but she will leave stuff alone when i do it.
    angelairelan

    Answer by angelairelan at 8:35 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I disagree strongly with 10 minute time out and hitting them. The wrap on the hand may make your child hit you back (this young, spanking just makes -them- spank you back or hit others and be more violent. There are studies proving this). When your child is about 3-4 years old is when they will finally understand that a wrap on the hand is because of something that they did - then you can threaten it to make them afraid -- but I am still anti-spanking, but, if you are pro-spanking you need to wait until they actually understand it to use it.

    10 minutes is way too long. They say time-outs should be according to double the childs age. 10 1/2 months, so about 2 minutes time-out if you do time-out.

    Thing is, they don't associate the time-out with the behavior YET . Time-out now is more for YOUR benefit if you think you are losing your cool!

    Redirection, according to my research, is much more effective..
    JamesAndMe

    Answer by JamesAndMe at 11:40 AM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • lol I took the time yesterday after you asked to look up punishment methods for 10 1/2 months old.

    Time-out was only effective because they forget what was going on or are now angry because they are in time-out, but then as soon as you resume what was irritating them they usually just go back to throwing a fit..

    It says time-out really only works once they hit about 2, and even then that is hit or miss and sometimes they think it is a game (atleast then they're not throwing an anger fit anymore huh!). lol

    And according to a bunch of studies hitting them this young makes them much more violent as toddlers and children..

    Everything says say "no" and gently redirect, or remove them from whatever situation is making them mad (you can't do that so!). Hope you have success with it. I bet you will.. especially if you get some new shiny toys and give enough attention when you're not working.. :)
    JamesAndMe

    Answer by JamesAndMe at 11:47 AM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • Thank you all for all of your advice! i cannot hit my son on the hand (that is what started him hitting), i figured this out the second time I tapped his little hand and he looked back at me and screamed while hitting me back. i have tried the redirecting... it just doesn't work, he likes things that light up lol But I think i have found something that works, I just pick him up and carry him across the floor every time he does something wrong. While telling him no he doesn't do that, i then sit him in the floor and walk away. so far it has worked great! :) He hates crawling back to whatever he was doing and goes on his merry way. Thank you ladies for all your help!
    Zacherysmommy08

    Answer by Zacherysmommy08 at 8:56 AM on Oct. 7, 2009

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