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Curse Words; Talking Back...Is soap in the mouth acceptable punishment?

So yes; my nosey self was reading in the Newcomer's Group again and there is a post regarding a child repeating a curse word and the mother having the child lick a bar of soap as punishment.

The amount of women saying "that's horrible" seems high to me; I'm wondering if it's just in that group or a new parenting attitude in general.

Personally; it is a tactic I will most definitely use; should my child defiantly use profanity or back talk me after being warned.

Why is a swipe of soap being viewed as such a horrific act? I don't get it. I'd bet $ I don't have that your parents and grandparents all survived such punishment and worse. Isn't this maybe why each generation is more out of control than the last...because we keep getting more & more lenient with consequences?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:36 PM on Oct. 3, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (107)
  • I remember the ivory soap from my childhood, it never really hurt me. I intend to use it myself.

    Answer by auroura at 9:39 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I was told by the school that it is illegal where I'm at because children have died. Then again time-outs are emotionally scarring according to this same school shrink. She claims that giving a child a safe quiet space with peaceful activities allows them to calm down and reflect. LOL I want a safe quiet place!

    Answer by h3art2h0m3 at 9:44 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I heard that some soaps can be toxic.That seems like a good reason not to do it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • Well, my mom used that one me a couple times and I cuss like a sailor now. It's not a matter of whether it hurts or not, simply put it doesn't work. Sure, some kids it effects, but most still cuss when they're older. My dad and mom do and they both had soap in the mouth. I'm sure you do and so will you kids. Just because something has been around for ages doesn't mean it works. I was spanked and still acted out. Niether one can be called dicipline if they don't work. Studies show that both are highly ineffective. Remember that next time your shoving soap down your kids mouth.

    Oh and have you ever thought of them possible choking on that? Stop being selfish and ignorant and start having patience with your kid.

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 9:46 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • in answer to your last question, YES! that is exactly why our youth is out of control! and now they're trying to outlaw spanking...,ggrrr...but no, licking a bar of soap is NOT big deal. i had to do it plenty of times when i was little, and i'm fine. kept me straight too., i barely even use profanity now. only time i do is if i stub a toe or something.

    this was a big deal on Super nanny, i think last year (or maybe 2 years ago?) a mom got tired of her son cussing at her so she put a DOT, actually, barely even a dot, of soap on his tongue and suppernanny had a FIT. you would think that the mom strangled him or something. jeez.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:47 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I'd check and make sure the soap you're using isn't toxic -- I know Dawn dish detergent isn't. That's what my mama used on me and yes, it's gross. But it's not like you're beating your child 'till he's black and blue. Seriously people. Kids need discipline, not "oh no, that's bad."

    Answer by CoffeeOrDeath at 9:49 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I have used soap in the mouth but my son said he liked the taste of soaps so I would go buy something I thought would be worse and he kept being defiant saying "hey this is good" so I got the old Lava soap! He didn't like that so much. That's one of those things that never killed me so I did it, not often but when his mouth got really out of control. When he was like under 3 and said a curse word closely after I had used it I would tell him that was a word only grown ups are allowed to say and Mommy should have not used it when he could hear. Kids have to learn what words are not appropriate,if we use them they see nothing wrong with them. When I worked at a daycare we had a boy (3 yo) who said F#*@ all the time we kept telling him he could not say that word at school one day he asked me "what word?" b/c he had been using it correctly he didn't know which word in a phrase I meant I finally said "we cannot say F#@*" he stopped

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 9:50 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I wouldn't say it's good or bad but I also wouldn't call it discipline. There are lots of things that worked in previous generations that don't work now.

    Answer by tnm786 at 9:52 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I think it's child abuse, sorry.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:53 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

  • I've heard some mothers used tabasco sauce.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:55 PM on Oct. 3, 2009

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