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How should I bring this up?

Lately I've been feeling kind of bored with my sex life. It all just seems to be so tame and routine now. I've started reading fanfiction online and I've discovered some pretty erotic ones that have things involved that fascinate me. Examples would be being tied up, blindfolded, spanked, etc. Tame dom/sub type stuff, if you know what I mean. I'm curious about it and would like to try something like that to spice things up. Pain doesn't bother me and I think I could handle it. I am a bit nervous about bringing it up to my DH, though. He isn't really too adventurous in bed, so I'm not sure how he'd react. What would be a good way to bring up the subject and try and convince him to go along with it just as an experiment to see if maybe he would like doing it?


Asked by Anonymous at 11:22 AM on Oct. 4, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • Maybe that is your perception of him... I would start by mentioning only the tamest of fetishes... And tell him by saying "I think it would be so HOT if we did..." It's best not to mention any of your current frustrations on your first attempt. You want him to feel excited rather than self-conscious that he's not fulfilling your needs. Sex is probably feeling routine for him too so try bringing a handkerchief or whatever to bed to start it off.

    Answer by preggoandfat at 12:21 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • I was in your place not that long ago.I just decided to look it one day with my DH sitting here with me hopeing that he would like at it.He just so happen to look at it and we sat together looking up things.We have even tried some of the things we saw.Don't be afraid to talk to your DH.Maybe even try looking up some porn.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:21 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • I'd just say "guess what I saw online today" Then I'd tell him and see his reaction. If it was a good reaction I'd ask if he wanted to try some of it.

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:15 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • You've got to just bring it up--- and try not to judge your DH. My Dh and I were in a flopped position from you and yours and he eventually ended up cheating online (thankfully I caught him before he meet anyone IRL). I have always been kinky, but I needed more romance- time and effort from him (that he was putting into the internet) to really let myself go. Your Dh may very well be curious (rarely is one person truly satisfied while the other is so bored they barely have a pulse) and ready to try new things!

    Answer by IrishMommaC at 3:52 PM on Oct. 4, 2009