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Where could she had came up with this? :(

About a week ago my dd she is 6 yrs. old and all of a sudden started to tell me she did not want me to die and was crying, I was like I am not going to die (which makes me sad bc we really don't know when our time is our time) I told her mommy is not going anywhere so get that out of your head. She asks we''ll don't we die and I said yes as we get old and if we don't take care of our bodies we can go even earlier it depends...I had to mention to her about her grandparents of course she got even sadder but it is the truth only God knows when our time is up.
I just told her to let's just enjoy life as it is. But now she is telling me that in school she kind of thinks about it and wants to cry but she holds it in...I don't want her to feel this way it makes me sad...where could this had came from.
What would you do?

She is a happy little girl but what can I do to make her get her mind off of this?
Thx ladies for listening.

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:13 PM on Oct. 4, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (8)
  • That's sweet. My DD has been there with the questions a few yrs ago. I said the same response, and probably she couldn't get it out of her mind like when we watch a long movie, and is has a sad ending , they see that ending as real, and can't stop wondering when we die and where we go.
    I started to explain that all we do each day is special and we can say nice things ....... even when we don't want to say them.

    Answer by coffeeyum at 5:28 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • Id be asking her teacher just WHAT she said or taught in class to make your child think like this. We all need to learn about death and accept it as Life is the greatest teacher of all, but unfortunately it kills every pupil it has ever had. Keep reassuring your child that your not going to die any time soon. Tell her you will be there always, even if as adults we know it's not true. She needs to be reassured right now because the concept of loosing a loved parent is more than her poor little brain can wrap itself around.

    Answer by vbruno at 5:29 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • Where your child got it from I have no idea. Maybe she overheard a news story or she has a schoolmate with a deceased parent. I wholly disagree with other posters who say tell her you aren't going to die anytime soon. the fact is you don't know that and accidents happen every day. My nephew was told exactly those same words by his father. Just a few months later his father was hit by a drunk driver and killed. My nephew had serious harsh anger for his Father. He believed his Dad lied to him. None of us knows when we will be taken. You tell your child that lots of people live to be very old. Sometimes accidents happen or people get sick. Tell her she can't think about the bad stuff that might happen because that means she is wasting time making happy memories with people she cares about. Assure her you are doing the best you can to be careful and to stay healthy.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 5:52 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • grr.. I din't word that properly. Tell her not to waste time worrying about the bad stuff. Use that time to make happy memories with people you care about.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 5:54 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • tell her more and more about god,and how heavan is a nice place.i realy dont know what u can tell her

    Answer by angelairelan at 7:33 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • My daughter did this when she was in preschool and they learned about the meaning of Easter. (It was a church preschool). She was upset about me dying and going to live with God and that it was just not an option for me. I tried to explain to her the best I could that no matter whether we were together or apart, I am in her heart because a mommies love always lives in there. I told her that I plan on being here for a long long time, but that sometimes we don't always know. It's a tough one to explain but just try to reassure her that everything will be ok!

    Answer by khedy at 10:44 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • My son first went throught his around the age of 4 1/2. His great-grandfather died and he has been questioning death ever since. At first his main concern was how his great-grandfather was going to eat if he was underground! It was quickly followed by when will I be going underground and as he has gotten older he has learned that no one knows when they will die but we are doing the best to stay around for a very long time. So hard to explain death to children of any age---and convince them that you are going to be around so they dont' need to worry but you can't tell the future.

    Answer by lissa27504 at 2:22 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • My 5 yr old son has recently started this as well. It is so heartbreaking but I just told him that we move on to the Summerland when we die and go to visit the Goddess and live with our friends and family who have gone before us. He seemed a little better after that- when I explained that we didn't just end- we went somewhere else and would see him again when he got there himself. Also of course assured him that we weren't planning on going anywhere for a very long time. Hope it helps- talkingto his therapist about it helped too.

    Answer by Jezture at 12:17 PM on Oct. 27, 2009

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