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How to control my mom?

My bf and I have not had a good relationship but we are trying, my mother hates him with a passion. and she is trying to make all the decisions as far as the babys name, how to raise him, she wants to cut the umbilical cord, basically all the things moms and dads do when they find out they are expecting , i am 28 weeks along and it just keeps getting worse and i don't know how to tell her, she is a real sensitive person and i ddon't want to push her away but she needs to relize that even if my and my bf are not together we are still the parents not her! anyone have any suggestions or share the same thing?

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Asked by ashaffer at 5:52 PM on Oct. 4, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (7)
  • My MIL tried to behave very similarly when my Dh and I were expecting our first. We (he... and in this situation you, because its your mother) had to "man up" and lay down the law--- then stick by it even though she cried and through an adult tantrum and was very miserable. Its hard to take that kind of a role with your parents--- but you have to remember, that *you* are the parent in the relationship you're protecting, and therefore have every right to make and keep your stance. Good Luck!

    Answer by IrishMommaC at 5:56 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • You have to approach the situation carefully. Just talk to her and explain that you know it is not an easy thing to say and that you are not doing this to hurt her, but you need to make these decisions and you are looking for her support!. Please do not have this talk with her when you are upset, the last thing you want is an argument. Do it when you are calm and ready. Remind her that she has already done these things and now it is your turn, regardless of how the relationship between you and your bf works out! Good Luck!

    Answer by Rebecca727 at 5:58 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • it sounds like she is being...a mom lol i'm sure she's doing all of this from her heart, and since she doesnt like your bf, I guess she assumes it "won't last" and she wants to kinda take over and be there for you. next time she brings something up that perhaps offends you or seems to be in the direction of "this is MY baby", let her know YOU are the mother and if you need some help she'll be the first person to know! If you dont want her to cut the cord, just tell her plain and simple. if she gets hurt, she'll get over it. she's just excited!

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 5:58 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • You and the father aren't together. Your mom will always be your mom and the grandmother of your child. Let her be excited and do as much as possible. If she gets hurt, she may never get over it.

    Answer by Gailll at 6:16 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • juts tell her look mom i know your not to thrill about my boyfriend but heis the father of my abbya na dthem man i love and wether you like it or not his the one who is gonna cut thecord. but try including her in someother stuff maybe she can help pick the baby's middle name and let her guide you. just ebcaused she says you should do this it doesmt mean you have to but is nice to have adviced. as for her ebing sensitive she is a grown woman she needs to get over it.

    Answer by piwife at 7:17 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • You can't control your mom. It is impossible to control another person. Instead, you take control of your own life and situation. Right now you are still acting like a little girl that's under her mother's thumb. Soon you will be a mommy yourself. It's time to take charge of yourself and your soon to be family.

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 9:20 PM on Oct. 4, 2009

  • i had the same problem i made my choice to get my own appartment for my son and i yeah my mom lives like litterally right next door but i try as much as i can to stay here and not at my moms so my ex and i can work things out because him and i want our family together but not with the rest of our families wanting to interfear with our lifes

    Answer by kristi_prncess_ at 11:35 AM on Oct. 6, 2009

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