Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Nobody to invite to a baby shower?

Two of my friends are planning my baby shower. The only thing is, there's really nobody to invite.

My mom's family are all not speaking to eachother, and are all judgemental and I haven't had anything to do with them in years.

My mom has made it clear she can't deal with anything except her own issues. (She wouldn't go anyways.)

My dads side, I only know 3 people. My aunt, my uncle, and my grandma. My aunt and uncle live out of state, and my grandma called me a whore because my daughter's dad has never seen her, and my fiance is calling her his daughter because he's raising her.

And my friends. I don't get along with girls too often and I only have like 4 friends I could invite. 2 of which are planning it.

The only other person is my friends mom. She'd go.

I don't even know the girls in my fiance's family

Should they keep planning it, to me it seems pointless.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:14 PM on Oct. 5, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (10)
  • I say do what you feel comfortable with. If you are okay with a small intimate gathering, go for it. If it would make you sad that it was small, call it off. It all depends on what you are comfortable with.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • why not make it men and women, that way you can have more guests? my shower had men and women. i understand some people are more traditional, but i personally think it's kind of odd to exclude men :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:23 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • Oh you sound so sad. Don't be. I have people in my life that were not around when I was pregnant or when my daughter was born. Guess what they are missing out not you and your beautiful children. If you don't want to make a big deal go celebrate at a restaurant and make it a intimate affair. You can have lunch and open your gifts there. I wish you the best and cheer up you have a new baby on the way. God Bless

    Answer by Jguevara at 4:24 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • I would do co-ed and invite your fiance's friends & family. Or... do a small thing at a restaurant and invite the few people that you know

    Answer by Jaydin_Makenna at 4:27 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • You can make it a Baby Party, instead. That way both genders and even children can come to celebrate the upcoming arrival.

    Or to keep it more intimate, you can have a very special Mother Blessing with midwives, doula, your closest friend or two, a mom, sister. Less that 10 people total is nice! (It is a wonderful way to celebrate Motherhood and birth!)

    Answer by doulala at 4:30 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • lol I have the same problem with other women. There are few I get along with. I have mostly guy friends which works out for my hubby because I get along with all his friends and don't mind when they come over. But then I don't get much girl talk and when it came to my baby shower I seriously only had one girlfriend come. The rest was family. If I were you I would take this oppertunity to get to know the women in your fiances family. Invite them. Whether you have a co-ed thign or not. Good luck!

    Answer by MizAnn at 4:36 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • you can try a baby shower for both you and your fiance, thats how mine was.


    you can just have a girls day with your friends, no one says it has to be a big party, but having a few girls meet up wont be so bad.

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 6:21 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • Oh


    I only have about 4 girl friends as well and I had a shower with my co-ed
    we had over 60 guests. My mom invited people she knew, my fiance invited people he knew, I invited some semi-close family, i too am not close to my family, and the numbers just kept multiplying

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 6:22 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • I think a coed " baby party" sounds super fun in this sittuation. If they want to plan, then let them enjoy it, it is fun planning for a party regardless.... Plus a baby party vs stressing over a traditional shower would give you a chance to celebrate with those in your life who are sharing in your joy vs. focusing on those who aren't ( THEIR LOSS!).

    This is a special time, and I think every baby deserves a chance to be welcomed and celebrated! I know their are lots of people who view baby showers as being more traditional, but there is no "wrong" way to celebrate your upcomming bundle of joy! Celebrate your life and the little one about to be welcomed into the world=)

    Answer by dylpickles7 at 10:39 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • I had the same situation! We had a smaller shower, and it was still fun! The people that don't get along should get over it, first of all. The shower is about the new baby, not them. Grown adults would suck up their differences and be there for you and the baby. I had the SAME sucks.

    Answer by itsbree2you at 10:58 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.