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Why am I treating him this way?

Let me start off by saying I LOVE my this man with all my heart and cant wait to be his wife. We have been together for almost 4 years now and just had our first baby in July. Lately, I get snippy with him for absolutly no reason and give him attitude for silly things that I normally wouldn't get the least bit bothered by. I NEVER get impatient or irritated with my baby so i don't think this is the baby blues but I don't know why I'm treating him this way. I love him and he isn't doing anything to deserve being treated this way. How can I get myself to be more patient with him? Leaving him has never crossed my mind so do I just need to find a way for us to reconnect after having a baby or what? Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thanks ladies :D

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:09 PM on Oct. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • How is he responding to this? I think if I was in your shoes I would just say the same thing to him that you've just said. Tell him how much you love him and how bad you feel about being this way and you don't mean to be and you don't know WHY you're being this way. That will help him realize you don't hate him. As far as learning to be more patient, well, you just gotta be on top of it. But I think what's also REALLY important is learning to be able to say, "I'm sorry." And learning to be able to do it right away when you realize you've done something hurtful. If you can learn that, it can actually STRENGTHEN your relationship. Good luck!
    Adelicious

    Answer by Adelicious at 8:14 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • It could be baby blues, but you are a great mother and now that your child is not a safe target. You SO is a safe target you know he loves you and you love him. I would recommend try to get more sleep were you can. Eat well and drink plenty of water. Most important find time for you. Go out any wear even with the baby if you are stay at home mom. If you work then something that makes you feel good. weather it is alone time or cuddling with SO and baby.  Do something that makes you feel pretty.

    DevilInPigtails

    Answer by DevilInPigtails at 8:19 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • Having a new baby is huge adjustment for everyone - you, baby, and your fiance - and it can be stressful. Just because you are not frustrated with the baby specifically doesn't mean that the way you are feeling is not connected to the huge change in your life that is a brand new baby. Try to talk to your fiance. When you are not feeling snippy tell him that you don't mean to snip at him so much and try to explain as delicately as possible how you are feeling. Make a point of spending time as just the two of you. Ask your mother or your MIL to watch the baby for a little while and have a little date. It can be really simple, just the two of you at home having an uninterrupted dinner could even work. Most grandparents are happy to have the alone time with the baby anyway. Just make sure you make time for each other and keep the communication going between you.I also noticed that one sincere drawn out hug goes a long way.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 8:22 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • It could be baby blues, you can be depressed and that doesn't mean you treat your baby badly. Drink lots of water, sleep more, pay close attention to your eating habits, and find out if there's other stresses in your life (family illness, finances, communication problems, etc) I went through tough times after my child was born but it got better in the end. Just take care of yourself :-) See a doctor or therapist/counselor because you can let off steam to them instead of your SO.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

  • You may not have to worry about leaving him. Keep this up and he'll leave you. Get control of yourself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:34 PM on Oct. 5, 2009

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