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Why do I feel so guilty when I leave my kids to go to work?

My daughter cries for me all the time when I leave. I have to work to make things happen. I try to explain that to her but she is only 3 years old and I don't think she really understands.

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Asked by Spoots31 at 2:39 PM on Oct. 6, 2009 in Money & Work

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Answers (10)
  • It's hard. My three year old is normally pretty good about being at the sitters, but lately he's been throwing a fit when i leave him. We just had another baby so that might have something to do with it, but it still makes me feel guilty! I'm not even working, it's just been the couple of times i needed a sitter since the baby was born. I'm thinking about going back to work though, and i hate the thought of leaving him again!

    Answer by MommaTurbo at 2:43 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • We are attuned to our children and their distress. It one way that Mother Nature keeps the species going, or did, anyway, way back when. So it is normal to feel dismay if the little one is sad.

    Answer by Bmat at 2:58 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • Three year olds WON'T get it. You just have to keep plugging along and save the guilt for the day you murder someone. (If you never do that, you never need guilt!)

    Answer by gdiamante at 4:44 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • How about this, you can stay home with your kids, be your own boss and work around your schedual with GREAT income!

    I'm happily engaged and we are about to buy our first home. We live in a small town where it is really hard to find a decent job, so I've been searching for a way to work at home. I recently found a home-based opportunity with no large investments and no risk! I work in the comfort of my own home with an international, 24 year old, Inc 500 company. All I do is set up customer accounts and do some online marketing. I work around my own schedule, with a group of amazing team members. I never even have to leave my own home to be successful!

    If this is something you'd be interested in, please visit my website.

    I think that once you hear more information about the company, you'll love it just as much as I do!

    I hope to hear from you soon :)

    Answer by lynsey7 at 6:39 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • Maybe you should stay home with your kids and raise them yourself instead of going to work.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • I'm a single mom and had to work outside of the home the first two years. It was horrible for me too. I signed up to sell Avon thinking I'd make enough to pay maybe the electric bill each month and instead I ended up making enough to stay at home with my son! Its worth a try! Its only $20 to sign up just go to and use reference code dhullum
    There are hundreds of ways to make money even if you don't know anyone and hate selling! I rarely leave the house for my company! I'd love to help you. Email me for questions.

    Answer by usbornebooksdh at 8:56 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • Because you're buying into the propaganda that children will be so permanently harmed by you going out to work. Of course, you're going to feel quilty. We all do, to some extent,, when we have to choose one option over another. I felt guilty when I didn't work and we almost went broke. Hard to be the happy-to-be-home SAHM when the bill collectors are calling and the gas is being turned off. Also feel guilty when I go to work (which I happen to love) and have to miss some of the kids' activities. It's the nature of motherhood.

    Answer by ceallaigh at 9:37 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • I understand how hard it is to leave with your little one constantly looking at you like, mom when are you coming back? I have a 14 month old and I work sometimes 16 hour days. Its hard on me because sometimes I leave right when he wakes up and theres nothing I can do about it. Sometimes I dont get to see him before he goes to bed. I was a sahm for a long time so when I first started working I would go home and just watch him sleep and cry myself to sleep. Its very difficult for me to work so much but in this world as it is, I have to work. I dont have the luxuory of sitting at home all day. Man wouldn't that be nice if the president gave mom's a monthly check just for reproducing!

    Answer by ashes_leigh at 1:42 AM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • Your daughter will need you around so much more between the ages of 12 and 18 than she does now. Now is the time to establish your career and get a good jump on retirement and college savings.

    Two minute after you walk out the door, she is happily playing!

    Answer by rkoloms at 5:01 AM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • That's human nature. I felt exactly the same way, the guilt was huge!!! I started a home business and eventually quit my FT job. Now that my kids are older, it is actually better, I make sure they stay out of trouble.

    Answer by marywoz at 7:05 AM on Oct. 7, 2009

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