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I need some advice. Please help me Moms!!

I pretty much have to hang out with my sister-in-law even though I dont want to and I dont like hanging out with her cause we have absolutely nothing in common and our personalities are very opposite. And she recently told me about how she has no friends to hang out with and she's happy she has a girl to finally hang out with. And I dont want to just never hang out with her leaving her with nobody to hang out with and then seem like i'm being mean or something,also I dont want to cause any tension between us because we all live in an apartment together (me my hubby, her and her hubby). Its also kind of like its expected for us to hang out because of us all living together. And so I'm basically stuck right now pretending to like hangin out w/ her and its driving me crazy! How can I tell them that I dont want to hang out w/ her w/out sounding mean or rude?

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Cindy588

Asked by Cindy588 at 5:02 PM on Oct. 6, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • Well, seeing how you live with her, you sound kinda scewed. If it were me I would try to keep myself busy with away from the apt. as much as possible.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:06 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • I dont know why she needs u to be her friend , all she needs is her hubby, I say talk to ur hubby and ask him how to address her, that u need space
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:10 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • I wouldnt address the issue I would just spend time with her when I could and the rest of the time I would go about my life. Just be independant and go about your business, when you ar eat home you will have to hang out some but she should see that you are busy doing stuff. get into a routine of living together and make I statements..I have to have time to myself or I go crazy lol, I prefer to watch tv in my bed...she will eventually realize she cant expect to just hang out with you all the time and she will maybe get a life...you shouldnt have to do everything together just cause you live together.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 5:14 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • Have you considered moving? I understand if money is an issue, but your peace of mind and happiness are also important. You need to set boundaries, and be honest with her, it's going to be easier on you and her if you are. Maybe have a heart to heart. Tell her you care about her but you have a separate life and you need your space. I don't think your Hubby should fix it for you, it's something you need to do so she doesn't feel like you hate her. GL, that's the best I can come up with.
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 5:16 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • I'd feel the same way. Just bc you are stuck with her doesn't mean you have to like hanging with her.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:18 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • Opposites attract. I'm sure if you let yourself, you could find things in common with her, if for the only reason being you are all living together. It's easier to keep the peace than stir up trouble because you have yourself convinced that having nothing in common means you cant be friends.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 5:58 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • move
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:24 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • Opposites attract. I'm sure if you let yourself, you could find things in common with her, if for the only reason being you are all living together. It's easier to keep the peace than stir up trouble because you have yourself convinced that having nothing in common means you cant be friends.
    ___
    This. I have friends that I actually have very little in common with.

    Give her a chance, you might actually like her.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 6:38 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • I have been giving her a chance like you said, we've hung out many times, and I've also Tried to find things in common, there's nothing, trust me. For me i personally dont like hanging out with people that i dont feel comfortable with. i mean litterally everything she likes, i dont. And everything i like, she doesn't. Theres hardly anything to talk about when we hang out, except maybe the weather....
    Cindy588

    Answer by Cindy588 at 7:11 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • Also another reason i dont like to hang out with her is because she is bossy. And is very very picky and likes everything to be perfect, her husband did mention something about her having some sort of OCD.
    Cindy588

    Answer by Cindy588 at 7:33 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

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