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My husband does not see the value in anything!!

He does not seem to see th value in things that we own or have been given to us. There has been many occasions where he has thrown away some of our sons toys when I leave the house. He feels that our boys have too many toys and just starts throwing them away without letting me even know. Same thing with clothes! One reason it upsets me is because he doesn't care if the stuff is new or expensive, he sees it all as useless since it isn't his stuff. He has thrown away new expensive toys on several occasions. There have been many times when I will search and search important paperwork to only to find that he had thrown it away. Recently a friend sent home some food with us in a nice bowl. It was left in the fridge too long without anyone eating it and started growing some mold. My husband just threw the whole thing away, and never told me. continued

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:31 PM on Oct. 6, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I went crazy looking for this bowl to return to her and he finally admitted to throwing it away. It cost $30 to replace the bowl for her.
    I am so fed up with him doing this! We are by no means rich and lose a lot of money because of his behavior. I can understand donating old things we don't need or use anymore, but he doesn't even donate just throws it away. And he does it all behind my back as well so I have no say in what we keep and what goes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:34 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • My mom was like that. She didn't care about the value. She cared that things were put in their place. I don't think you can change him so I suggest (from experience) that you have the kids put their toys away and keep the clothes put up along with anything else that you or the kids deem as valuable. Neat freaks drive me nuts but I learned big time to never leave anything down at my mom's house.

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:54 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • You know sometimes it's good to have a man like that if you are a hoader like me we will go crazy sooner or later not to mention I think our dh's are twins bc my dh is the same way when he gets a wild hair up his butt things start to dissapear. And I asked my self what was there that I didn't notice it was gone until it was actually gone then I say it must of not been that important if I can't remember besides it looks alot So sometimes give thanks...I guess after all it will stay behind when we leave this

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:05 PM on Oct. 6, 2009

  • i believe he needs to be askin you hey you know can we throw this away if not can it be sold in a yard sale or even can it be giveing away and i know this might not work on him but when someone lets you barrow a dish or just anything i would tell him hun do not throw this away plz it dont belong to us good luck sweetie i hope all gets better for you

    Answer by brittanymomma at 12:14 AM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • I think I would maybe start taking his important things and hiding them (like at a friend's garage) until he sees how much this can bother a person and settles down. I know my husband doesn't always see why I keep things, but he feels that they are "mine' and not his. And to him that's just rude. (Honestly that can drive you nuts too though. If I tell him its in my purse, he brings me my purse, because he refuses to put a hand in there.)

    Answer by Lesli at 12:47 AM on Oct. 7, 2009

  • maybe you can set up a big box in the garage or something and ask if he can just throw things in there if he wants to throw it away. That way you can at least retrieve it. Maybe he is a neatfreak and you are more sloppy? Maybe you can both come to a compromise.

    Answer by Allie428 at 1:55 AM on Oct. 7, 2009

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